Night at the Museum Page #7

Sarcasm back at you,

with your humor box.

I wasn't laughing. Pretending to laugh...

...if that's what you want,

some sort of battle of humor.

Do you?

No.

I don't want--

No, I don't want a battle of humor.

No, you don't,

because it would be a bloodbath.

Nothing funny about Little Bighorn.

No. I find it about as funny

as a "fancist."

It's not funny. Okay? And I will not

stand for this type of blatant....

If I'm not clear, tell me.

Am I clear?

-Yeah.

-Yeah?

Hey, Cecil?

You got an extra copy

of that instruction manual?

Oh, no. I'm afraid not, Larry.

Listen, I'll tell you what you do.

Read some books.

Brush up on your history.

Helped me a lot when I first started out.

This museum was originally dedicated

to that man on the horse up there...

...President Theodore Roosevelt.

He absolutely loved history and believed

that the more you know about the past...

...the better prepared you are

for the future.

Okay, kids. Who can tell me

what this room's called?

Very good. The Hall of African Mammals.

Right here we have the king of the jungle,

the lion.

Up ahead is one of my favorite creatures

in the whole museum, the capuchin monkey.

A highly intelligent primate

known for its loving and generous nature.

Excuse me?

I just thought that was....

I just was laughing in agreement.

Happy monkey.

All right, kids. This way.

Let me tell you something.

I'm not buying it.

You might have them fooled,

you might have the kids fooled. Not me.

Can't get past me.

There's a storm coming, buddy.

There's a storm coming.

One of the most famous trackers

in history, Sakagawea was the woman...

...who led Lewis and Clark on

their expedition to find the Pacific Ocean.

You guys have heard the saying,

"Actions speak louder than words."

And yet they wrote--

-Yes, Mr. Daley?

-Yes. Was she deaf?

Was she deaf? No. She was not.

But she--

Yeah, because-- Just-- She does seem

a little bit sort of unresponsive.

That's because she's a statue.

Kids, could you give me one sec?

Go check her out. She's really cool.

-What are you doing?

-I'm gonna be here every night.

I wanted to learn a little bit more

about what I'm guarding.

Actually, I've got a bunch of questions.

Maybe when you have a break,

could I buy you a cup of coffee?

A cup of coffee?

Yeah, I mean, just purely a, you know...

...colleague-to-colleague,

information-download sort of coffee.

I finish in 20 minutes.

I'll meet you outside.

-Thank you.

-You're welcome.

-And have a good rest of your--

-All right. Okay, kids.

It was incredible what she did.

She literally led these men

across rivers, up mountains...

...all with her newborn baby on her back.

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