Never Give a Sucker an Even Break

How are you, Chuck?

Hello, Gorgeous. Oh, say, your

daughter's looking for you.

Oh, thanks.

I'll take the next bus.

Okay, Gorgeous.

Oh, hello, Mother.

Who're you doubling today?

Lydia Flickham

in an aerial act.

Be careful.

Say, I thought you were

supposed to be rehearsing.

I haven't even started yet.

Well, you knock them over in that

rehearsal and I'll let you support me.

Uncle Bill said if he sells the

script, you won't have to work anymore.

Oh, your Uncle Bill is too good.

We owe him too much already.

Look what I found

this morning.

Close your eyes.

Wish.

Was that a buptkie!

You're about to fall heir

to a kitters stocking.

What's a kitters stocking?

A sock on the puss.

Another buptkie.

Raspberries!

Raspberries!

Raspberries!

Raspberries!

Raspberries!

Hiya, tootie pie.

Everything under control?

Who are you talking to?

All five of them

hit me at once.

Hi.

It's a lucky thing

I recognized you.

I thought it was that guy

coming back again.

I was about to

clout your brains out.

How about a part in this new

picture you're going to do?

Go away or I'll kill you.

You're all right.

You're all set.

Thank you, Mr. Fields.

How would you

like to hide the egg

and gurgitate a few

saucers of mocha java?

No, thanks.

I've just had breakfast.

Oh, you have, eh? Well, call

me up at sometime at the house.

What time?

Oh, a couple o'clock.

Good morning, beautiful.

What do you hear

from Garcia?

A ringer!

Got a menu?

Thank you. Thank you.

Is there any goulash

on this menu?

That's roast beef gravy.

Oh, it's roast beef gravy.

Is that steak

New York cut?

What about...

No extra charge

for the cold shower, I hope.

Do you think

it's too hot for pork chops?

That practically eliminates

everything but ham and eggs.

Forgot about that.

No ham?

Two fomented eggs

in a glass.

Cup.

Yes. Cup.

And some whole wheat...

White.

Some white bread, yes.

And a... Get away from there.

And a cup of

mocha java with cream.

Milk.

Milk. Yes, that's fine.

Two in the water! Easy!

I don't know

why I ever come in here.

Flies get

the best of everything.

Go away. Go away.

Get away. Go on.

Oh, yes, Mr. Pangborn.

Yes, we just made it.

Yes, I'll have Gloria Jean

ready whenever you say.

All right.

Thank you, Mr. Pangborn.

And another thing, you're

always squawking about something.

If it isn't the steak,

it's something else.

I didn't squawk

about the steak, dear.

I merely said

I didn't see that old horse

that used to be

tethered outside here.

You're as funny

as a cry for help.

You also pulled that old gag about

breaking your fork in the gravy.

I didn't say anything about

breaking the fork in the gravy.

Usert you be

an old Folies girl?

You know, there's something

awfully big about you.

Thank you, dear.

Thank you, dear.

Your nose.

Something awfully big

about you, too.

Hiya, Tiny.

Hiya, Joe.

Give me a cup of jamo.

Probably means mocha java.

What's the amount

of the insult?

That'll be 35 cents.

Thirty-five cents.

Thank you.

Have you any

imported cigars?

Stingaroos. Four for a nickel.

Oh, that's fine

as long as they're imported.

You know, if anybody ever comes

in here and gives you a $10 tip,

scrutinize it carefully

because there's a lot of

counterfeit money going around.

I'll give you the dough.

Don't... Here. There.

If I get any counterfeit nickels or

pennies, I'll know where they came from.

You're so clever.

Who told you I was clever?

All your friends

at the studio told me.

Oh, drat! I told them

not to tell you.

And another thing. Don't

be so free with your hands.

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