Mrs In-Betweeny

Synopsis: After the death of their parents, three children are put into the care of their aunt Brandon - unaware of the fact she is a transgender woman. Over time, as they get used to the idea, the ...
Genre: Drama
54 min

Firstly, may I convey my sincere

condolences at this saddest of times.

To lose one parent is a tragedy,

but to lose both and in such a...

unique way... Well, words cannot convey

how you three poor, unfortunate

children must be feeling.

But, how heartening for you to know that

you have such a warm, loving family around you.

So, to the real reason why we are all here today.

About time. Senile old fart.

I'm sorry?

I said... About time, senile old fart!

Oh, quite, yes.

Err... well... let me see... ah!

In the unlikely event of both our

deaths we propose the following

Until such time as our children

are of legal age to care for themselves

we'd like as their guardian...



- What's wrong with him?

- Phone 999. Get an ambulance.

- Check his pulse.

- Who's looking after us?

Take his teeth out.

- What ?

- He might choke.

- Is he dead?

- You take 'em out!

- I think he's dead.

- Well?

- Give us a hand.

- Thank you!

- Get him on his side.

- Uncle Neil ?

- Yeah.

- Who's looking after us?

- That's a mistake.

- Brendan...

It was supposed to be me.

Uncle Brendan!


benji1000 & Arcueil

Delayed flight 1795 from Las

Vegas has now landed.

So is Uncle Brendan our new dad?

Yeah, well, sort of.

- He's not coming.

- Maybe he's died too.

He'll be here, OK?

Don't worry, he'll be here.

- Oh, I need a wee.

- You'll have to wait, Kevin.

- It landed ages ago.

- Maybe he's on a later flight.

I walked straight past you.

Put on a bit of weight since

last I saw you, Neil.

Don't tell me you've given up.

- Err, no, cheers.

- Mags not with you?

They're divorced.


Fuckin' hell!

Come on...

Wow, they did all right for

themselves here, eh?

Bar their sudden deaths, obviously.

So, what's the story with you and Maggie?

Had you down as mates for life ?

- He shagged another woman.

- Yet another woman.

Makes a change from me screwing up.

So Uncle Brendan, does this still

mean you're our new dad?

Let's talk about that later, shall we, Kev?

- Well?

- Hum.

- Is he there yet?

- Who?

Your brother!

Oh, yeah. She's, he's...

he's just got here.

I'm not coming round. He can beg

all he likes, not without an apology.

I hope he's changed for all our sakes.

I think that's a distinct possibility.

Look, Kathleen's here.

I, err, I, I've gotta go.

- Err, can I speak to my grandchildren...

- Bye.

Oh, hey, look. Japanese

love eggs. Oh, look...

Also known as 'The Satisfier'.

Just run them under the tap and put

them in the cupboard with the others.

Where is he?

I'm going to need a car.


I'll need to go to the shops,

take them to school...

- So, you, you're stopping, then?

- I am their legal guardian.

Great! Look, hem, Holly's

written everything down.

Mean sports clubs, music lessons,

dietary requirements...

- Kevin's seeing a shrink?

- No, behavioural therapist.

School thinks you're a little different

and suddenly you're a...


- How long have you been like this?

- Nice segue, Neil.

Started the procedure 18 months ago.

Look, 'cause they look, I mean...

- They feel almost...

- Hormone therapy.

- What, so you mean they're actually...

- All me.


- What is it now, then? Brenda?

- Emma.

- Right. 'course.

- And no.

I'm not, you'll be relieved to know.

- What?

- Gay.

So you're not...?

Unless, of course,

I start fancying other women?

Right so, so you do fancy men?

I'm kind of sitting on the

fence on that one.

Look bollocks, Brendan...

I don't mean...

I'm sure you have changed, yeah?

Clearly. But these are Ben's

Rate this script:(0.00 / 0 votes)

Paul Abbott

Paul Abbott (born 22 February 1960) is an English television screenwriter and producer. Abbott has become one of the most critically and commercially successful television writers working in Britain today, following his work on many popular series, including Coronation Street, Cracker and Shameless, the last of which he created. He is also responsible for the creation of some of the most highly acclaimed television dramas of the 1990s and 2000s, including Reckless and Touching Evil for ITV and Clocking Off and State of Play for the BBC. more…

All Paul Abbott scripts | Paul Abbott Scripts

FAVORITE (0 fans)

Submitted on August 05, 2018

Discuss this script with the community:



    Translate and read this script in other languages:

    Select another language:

    • - Select -
    • 简体中文 (Chinese - Simplified)
    • 繁體中文 (Chinese - Traditional)
    • Español (Spanish)
    • Esperanto (Esperanto)
    • 日本語 (Japanese)
    • Português (Portuguese)
    • Deutsch (German)
    • العربية (Arabic)
    • Français (French)
    • Русский (Russian)
    • ಕನ್ನಡ (Kannada)
    • 한국어 (Korean)
    • עברית (Hebrew)
    • Gaeilge (Irish)
    • Українська (Ukrainian)
    • اردو (Urdu)
    • Magyar (Hungarian)
    • मानक हिन्दी (Hindi)
    • Indonesia (Indonesian)
    • Italiano (Italian)
    • தமிழ் (Tamil)
    • Türkçe (Turkish)
    • తెలుగు (Telugu)
    • ภาษาไทย (Thai)
    • Tiếng Việt (Vietnamese)
    • Čeština (Czech)
    • Polski (Polish)
    • Bahasa Indonesia (Indonesian)
    • Românește (Romanian)
    • Nederlands (Dutch)
    • Ελληνικά (Greek)
    • Latinum (Latin)
    • Svenska (Swedish)
    • Dansk (Danish)
    • Suomi (Finnish)
    • فارسی (Persian)
    • ייִדיש (Yiddish)
    • հայերեն (Armenian)
    • Norsk (Norwegian)
    • English (English)


    Use the citation below to add this screenplay to your bibliography:


    "Mrs In-Betweeny" STANDS4 LLC, 2021. Web. 14 Apr. 2021. <>.

    We need you!

    Help us build the largest writers community and scripts collection on the web!

    Watch the movie trailer

    Mrs In-Betweeny

    The Marketplace:

    Sell your Script !

    Get listed in the most prominent screenplays collection on the web!


    The Studio:

    ScreenWriting Tool

    Write your screenplay and focus on the story with many helpful features.

    Thanks for your vote! We truly appreciate your support.