Mike and Dave Need Wedding Dates

Synopsis: Hard-partying brothers Mike (Adam Devine) and Dave (Zac Efron) place an online ad to find the perfect dates (Anna Kendrick, Aubrey Plaza) for their sister's Hawaiian wedding. Hoping for a wild getaway, the boys instead find themselves outsmarted and out-partied by the uncontrollable duo.
Director(s): Jake Szymanski
Production: 20th Century Fox
  4 nominations.
Rotten Tomatoes:
98 min

Oh, no, oh, no

Ahhh, oh, no, ahhh, oh, no

Ahhh, oh, no

No, she don't mess around

No, she don't mess around

100% blue agave.

Taste it.

Look, Mike, I like you.

But no one's looking

for another brand of tequila.

They've got the three... What is it?

The Cuervo, the other one,

and the third one.

And they don't need more tequila.

- If I can't sell it, it's not gonna sell.

- People want the new-new.

- The "new-new"?

- The "new-new."

They want that new-new.


What if I could sell this tequila

to a customer?

- Would I have your order then?

- Yeah, sure.

And I'm just gonna pick a customer

at random.

Excuse me, sir.

Do you enjoy the taste of tequila?

Why, yes, I do.

But I only drink my particular brand,

and you will not convince me otherwise.

- It's a perfect candidate.

- Because it's your brother!

I know that's your brother.

He dated my niece.

Look, mate, I don't know your niece.

- Okay.

- But if I did...

I'd say she was a little clingy,

and she'd freak a lot of people out.

We play Wards With Friends

together, right?

- Dave, right?

- Name's Rick. Just got in from Melbourne.

His name's Rick.

I know he's your brother.

Look, look, look.

You guys are funny, you're weird.

We do this every couple weeks...

All right, I'll take 10 cases.

- F***, yes!

- Yes!

Yes! I knew it!

- We sold your ass, Randy!

- I don't know if that's what happened.

- It was the hat, right?

- Was it the hat?

I just found this over there.

Do something crazy

Live like it's Mardi Gras

And go jump, make the party start

Don't need no R&R

To regular life, I say Au revoir

Yay! Living life in the fast lane

Now your pain only be champagne

So please come join me

One thing, good vibes only

Start the keg, I'mma fill my cup

Got fireworks, got booze

Let's blow some sh*t up

Tonight I'm going stupid

Doing things I've never done

We all got one thing in common

We just wanna have fun

Do something crazy


Do something crazy

Do what you wanna do

Do something crazy

I'm about to do

I'm about to do

Do something crazy

Do something crazy

Do something wild

Rolling with the homies

Chicks by my side

Live for the moment

All of the time

Turn up the music

Only good vibes

Sorry to throw the accent at you, bro.

No, dude. I loved it,

and it kept me in the now.

Do you realize that that sale puts us

at number three in the office?

The Stangle bros are killing it right now!

It's not an actual hat.

They just call it a jimmy hat.

If you wear two, they break.

- It's an urban legend...

- No, it's not.

Mom, Dad?

Jeanie. Eric.

Don't freak out.

I don't want you to freak out.

Just come on in.

Why don't we all just sit down?

We gotta talk to you.

We wanna discuss

Jeanie and Eric's wedding.

- Oh! Sweet.

- Okay.

Are you guys thinking DJ or band?

First thought, band, right?

No. People want to hear the real songs.

You don't want to hear a guy

singing Beyonc.

You just want to hear Beyonc.


Yeah, but we want to talk about...

is you two.

Now, over the years...

a theme has emerged

at our family gatherings.

Everyone's having a good time...

- That's right.

- Things are going smoothly.

Party time.

And then you two show up...


and you hit on girls...

you act like idiots...

and you ruin it.

Ruin it.

- What? We are not party ruiners!

- Mm-mm.

We're party creators!

And besides, when have we ever

ruined a family event?


We thought you might say that.

Yep, here we go. And we just stream it.

Apple TV.

We just need your password.

- Bryan's baby dick 69.

- Yeah.

Bryan's baby dick 69.

What the f***, guys? Really?

- Got it. Yep.

- Is that it?


Happy Fourth of July!

Oh, sh*t!

It was fun up to that point.

God damn it! My trailer!

Oh, sh*t.

Actually, this is what

we're trying to avoid.

- The both of you are f***ing idiots.

- F***ing losers!

Grandpa, wake up! Take his tie.

Are you saying we had something to do

with Grandfather's death? Hmm?

He died five years after that!

That is a lot of guilt to put us.

Shame on you.

Plus, this video only shows the screw-ups.

Where's the epic tracking

shots of smiling faces?

And everybody looking at us, just going...

"God, I love Mike and Dave.

"They made this whole party worth it."

When are the two of you going to grow up?

This shtick was cute for a while...

but it's gotten stale.

Mom, come on, what are you...

You're talking about us like

we're a couple of losers or something.

What we don't want you to do is

go chasing girls and get out of control.

- You understand?

- Wait, we can still talk to girls, right?

- You can each talk to one girl.

- The girls that you bring to the wedding.

- What do you mean?

- I want you to bring a date.

- That's two dates.

- You want us to bring dates to a wedding?

- Excuse me?

- Are you allowed to do that?

Nice, respectable, smart girls!

Keep you in line.

- What the f***?

- What?

- Are you insane?

- Oh, you're kidding.

You are not screwing up this wedding.

Do you hear me?

Mom, do you hear this river of horse sh*t

coming out of Dad's mouth?

We don't want you showing up stag

and riling each other up!

- We don't rile each other up!

- We never get riled up!

- I don't get riled!

- He doesn't and I don't, either!

Look at you right now! You're riled!

- Take your head out of your ass, Dad!

- You sound insane right now.

Everybody stop yelling! Okay?

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Andrew Jay Cohen

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Submitted on August 05, 2018

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