Metro Manila Page #3

What the heck are you doing?

That's a mouthwash!

Here, take this.

Wash it afterwards, and return it to me.

Hold that thought.

After your work,

just buy me a new one instead.

- Okay?

- Thank you, sir.

All right.

Go on and lie down.

Raise your legs.

Right.

Spread them a little.

Do you know

you're pregnant?

I'd say about 5 or 6 weeks.

My daughter has a toothache,

Can you take a look?

I'm not a dentist.

There are two types of employees

in this company, Oca.

The inside personnel

and the drivers.

They can not communicate.

Because the drivers are not permitted

inside the Processing Center.

Even if you are hired,

you will not be allowed inside again.

Unless, of course,

you are robbed.

And you're summoned for debriefing.

Eyes straight!

Thank you very much

for this opportunity.

Right.

Do your best.

Officer Alvares,

your next.

Enter.

F***ing ex-cops.

They apply here and think

they're better than us.

I know because I was

a former policeman myself.

Oca, heed my advices.

The name of the big boss is Buddha.

But we call him

the Laughing Buddha.

Because he likes jokes.

Always asking newcomers

for some comedy.

Comedy?

Yes. He wants to know

if you got some personality.

If you are quick-witted.

But, I don't know any jokes.

Don't you know

about the three women

who applied for a job in a bar?

Check this, Oscar...

You're not qualified.

You were just recommended

by Ong.

But according to him...

You're just a farmer.

In Banaue.

You don't even have any

experience as a guard.

Neither as a law enforcer.

None, sir.

Well, you'll do.

After all, you have no idea yet

of their bad ways.

We'll be the ones

teaching it to you.

My way.

Oscar...

Tell me a joke.

A joke, sir?

So I'll be happy.

There were three

women applicants in a bar.

While facing the manager,

he asks:

"If you find yourselves P500

on the floor of the bar..."

"What would you do with them?"

The first woman says:

"Well, I'll pick it up."

"Return it to the cashier."

The second woman says:

"I'll ask if someone

has lost some money."

"And if none,

give it to the cashier."

And the third one...

She says:

"I would step on it."

"If nobody is looking,"

"pocket the money."

So who got hired?

Well, the one with the biggest

b*obs.

(bursts into laughter)

"You're sexy!"

"I used Lesofat!"

Pa!

- Pa, look!

- Where did you get that?

The doctor gave it.

He cured my tooth and gave me

free lollipops. Here, Pa!

- How did you get an appointment with the doctor?

- The Baranggay Health Center.

You, how was your interview?

Wow, a new polo shirt.

Where did you get it? Nice.

From a friend.

Well, a new friend.

My new boss!

Boss? What do you mean?

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