Me, Myself & Irene Page #3

the goddamn electron? Can l put it here?

Enrico Fermi'd roll over in his

motherfuckin' grave if he heard that.

He'd just turn over ass up in yo' face.

Man, Jamaal.

Just cut my man some slack.

l'm just trying to help him save face.

He keep askin' questions,

they'll think he's stupid.

-l ain't stupid.

-Mornin' , fellas.

Hey, Pops, how you doin' , man?

-What's all the commotion?

-Oh, just school sh*t and sh*t.

-How's my little guy doing?

-Struggling.

Quantum physics is confusing. lf l don't

buckle down, l'll get myself another B+ .

Oh, that'd be whack.

He's so f***ing dumb,

he thinks calculus is a goddamn emperor.

Give it up, dawg.

Well, you think polypeptide's

a motherfuckin' toothpaste.

Oh, l gotta get out of here.

l don't wanna have to bust a cap.

Kisses.

Daddy.

-See ya later.

-Love ya.

Yeah, Charlie was getting

a lot of respect inside the house.

But outside. . .

Well, that was another story.

Mornin' , Ed.

Charlie.

Ed, did you see

where my paper went today?

The wife's got it in the shitter.

Well, could you tell her to throw it

on the porch when she's done?

Can't you get one at work?

Yeah. . .

l suppose l could.

You betcha.

l'd like that

lf we could cycle down some lane

l'd like that

lf we could ride into the rain

No macs, getting wet

l'd be your Albert

lf you'd be Victoria

Ha-ha, we'd laugh

because each drop would make me

Grow up really high, really high

Like a really high thing, say a sunflower. . .

-Hey, George, Herb.

-Hi, Charlie.

-How do, fellas?

-Hi, Charlie.

-Listen, Dick. . .

-Hey, guys, check out the rack on this one!

Oh, yeah ! That's what Daddy likes.

lt looks like a dead heat in a zeppelin race.

-A couple of Hindenburgs, huh?

-Oh, the humanity!

Come on, guys, take it easy. She's a mom.

"She's a mom !"

-She's a mom. Not my mom.

-She's a yummy mummy!

You kill me!

Sure, that is good.

Listen, Dick,

l'm sorry to bother you like this but. . .

Your car is gonna have to be moved.

Yeah, sure, Charlie. OK. l should be

done here in another 1 0 or 1 5 minutes.

l hate to be a stickler, Dick, but. . .

The law says you can't park in one place

for over an hour,

and you've been there for. . .

Going on three days now.

All right, all right. The law's the law.

Park it up behind the grocery store,

will ya, Charlie?

Yeah, sure.

This one?

There's an old saying: an ostrich with

his head in the sand makes a lousy cop.

You see, if you can't deal

with your own problems,

well, it's hard to deal with others.

Sweetie? That's kinda dangerous.

Wanna move it on to the sidewalk,

away from traffic?

My dad says you're a joke

and l don't have to listen to you.

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