Mars Attacks! Page #4

Whoa. He made the international sign

of the doughnut.

From the limited information available,

I've made three extrapolations.

One, our Martian friend

is a carbon-based life form.

Two, he breathes nitrogen.

And three,

the large cerebrum here indicates...

...telepathic potential.

You mean they can read our thoughts?

-Potentially, yes.

-What about their intentions?

Are they a friendly people?

Logic dictates that given their extremely

high level of technical development...

...they're an advanced culture...

...therefore, peaceful and enlightened.

The human race, on the other hand...

...is an aggressively dangerous species.

Now, I suspect they have

more to fear from us...

...than we from them.

-Doctor.

-Thank you, professor.

For many years,

I've been refining a translating computer.

The results are not perfect...

...but this may answer

some of your questions.

All green of skin...

...800 centuries ago.

Their bodily fluids

include the birth of half-breeds.

-How many centuries did he say?

-Eight hundred, sir.

--self-determination of the cosmos.

For dark is the suede

that mows like a harvest.

What the hell does that mean?

-Hey, Mitch.

-Good morning, miss.

I'm sorry, you can't come this way.

There's a tour in progress.

Oh.

Hello, my name is Barbara.

Hello, Barbara.

I am an alcoholic,

but I haven't had a drink in three months.

Thank you.

I'm feeling so optimistic

because of the Martians.

We're not alone in the universe.

And it's so perfect...

...that it's happening at the beginning

of the new millennium.

Our planet was suffering

with the ozone and the rain forest...

...and so many people

unhappy in their lives.

And then the Martians heard

our global karmic cry for help.

People say they're ugly...

...but I think they've come

to show us the way.

I think they've come to save us.

Thank you.

Bye-bye.

You be careful, baby, okay?

Don't get yourself killed.

Oh, ain't she cute?

-Son, we're real proud of you.

-Thanks, Dad.

Let me take this.

-So long, bro.

-So long, retard.

Just don't be touching none of my stuff

while I'm gone.

Bye-bye, Grandma.

Goodbye, Thomas.

It's Billy Glenn, Grandma.

I know. Thomas. Ha-ha-ha.

Bye-bye, honey.

I got to go.

All right.

I love you, baby.

Adios.

Be careful, boy.

Bye-bye.

Well, he'll be all right.

-I hope so.

-Army trains them good.

Well, he's gone for a while.

Oh, Richie, why can't you be more

like your brother?

Darling, we got plumb lucky

with Billy Glenn.

Can't expect the same luck twice.

Richie, want to make yourself

useful for a change?

-Sure, Dad.

-Take Grandma back to the home.

Grandma, I bet you never thought you'd

Rate this script:0.0 / 0 votes