Maid of Salem Page #5

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about me, Miles.

I consider it my duty,

for when I marry,

l"m entitled by the colony

to take for myself

a fine piece

of bottom land

with a brook on it,

and I shall have

three horses,

six cows, 10 pigs.

Ten... That seems

an over abundance

of pigs.

Moreover, the Elders

think well of me.

The people in the village

listen when I talk.

One day

I shall be an Elder.

(LAUGHlNG) Oh, Miles.

You laugh too freely,

Barbara.

After marriage,

l"ll not brook

such frivolity.

Indeed.

The Elders have been

speaking of you and me

as a proper couple,

and my mother

is of a mind

that we should

be married soon.

Miles,

you sweep me

off my feet!

So, you make sport

of the Elders" suggestion?

Sport of me?

Well, l"ll not

be laughed at

through supper.

Oh, no, Miles!

Miles, I did not mean

to flout you.

Besides,

we have chicken

for supper.

You cannot induce me.

Susy Abbot"s

a right-thinking girl,

and the Abbots

always have chicken.

Miles.

(GROANS)

Oh, chicken.

Don"t touch.

Where"s Miles?

Aunt Ellen,

please forgive me,

but I made a jest.

And l"m afraid

he understood it.

Barbara!

And weighing

his pride against

your good chicken,

he decided

not to come.

Oh, Barbara!

You cannot refuse

every young swain

in the village.

It is your duty to marry

and have children,

to the glory of God

and the colony.

But would you

have me marry a man

who boasts only of

his fine bottom lands,

his three horses,

six cows, 10 pigs,

and treats me like

one of his livestock?

Oh, faith!

The man is a blockhead.

I cannot abide him

or his pigs!

But the chicken,

enough for a family of six.

Oh, yes, the chicken.

ROGER:
Chicken. Ambrosia!

Food for the gods!

Mistress,

you"ve saved my life.

Sure I wouldn"t

be discourteous

to the lobsters

of Massachusetts,

but to have them

for breakfast,

dinner and supper.

Why, the very expression

of a lobster"s eye

brings to my mind

our red-faced Governor

of Virginia.

Hail to the colony, I say,

but confound the governor.

You"ll be confounded

yourself

if you don"t stay away

from the village.

As I nearly was today,

it was in the shadows

of the forest.

I came suddenly

upon a people-minded

villager,

and he held up

his finger so.

Whereupon,

I threw my cloak

over my head,

Ieaped behind a tree

and bellowed like a demon.

And how that villager ran.

He ran so fast,

his legs couldn"t

keep up with him,

so that he fell

and rose howling

and ran some more.

Isn"t it good to hear

a man laugh so freely?

Aye, we seldom

hear it in this place.

That"s your penance

for living among

these Puritans, Uncle.

Not meaning yourself,

mistress.

It"s true they"re not much

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