
Landmine Goes Click
- TV-MA
- Year:
- 2015
- 105 min
- 293 Views
[Overlapping chatter
in different languages]
[Soft European music]
[Man]
And we're listening
to this because...
[Woman]
It's the only show in town.
[Man #2]
That's nice for him.
He's got a completely
captive audience.
[Woman]
I wonder what he's saying.
[Man]
People of earth,
do not be afraid.
[Woman]
Assimilation is painless.
[Man #2]
Yeah, but probing not so much.
Hey, we could use my phone
to play some music.
[Man]
There is no auxiliary.
- [Man #2] Well, shit.
- [Woman laughs]
- [Man] Indeed.
- [Woman] We will live.
[Man #2]
I will not.
[Man]
I need a quick stop, okay?
- [Soft Latin music]
- [Groans] Whoo.
[Man #2]
That good, huh?
Did you think about
what I said?
Yes.
I think it's a mistake.
What, what we did, or...
What we did
doesn't matter anymore, okay?
But telling him
about it does.
- Yeah, it does.
- So we say nothing.
What, what do you think,
I wanna tell him
Just to break you guys up?
Should I?
[Man]
You know this place
used to be a warzone
[Man #2]
A warzone, really?
- [Woman] Huh.
- [Man] Yeah, tanks, artillery,
Mines, the whole deal.
[Man #2]
What was it, like a civil war?
[Man]
Russians invaded.
[Chuckles]
Shocker.
Fucking Russians, man,
they just don't get it,
nobody likes them.
I mean seriously,
name one good thing
To come out of Russia
other than, like,
Really hot
girl tennis players.
- [Woman laughs]
- [Man] Vodka.
- [Woman] Yeah, there's that.
- [Man #2] Vodka?
Shit, even the French
make better vodka.
[Man]
Oil and gas.
- [Woman] What?
- The Russians,
They make oil and gas.
[Man #2]
They don't make oil and gas,
They have oil and gas.
[Woman]
Yeah, right, it's not like
Anyone said wow,
this Russian oil
is so much better than that
- [Man] Hold up,
Let me get my bearings.
- Are we on course?
- Yeah, I think we are.
I give you the ak-47.
- When you absolutely...
- [Woman chuckles]
Positively gotta kill
Every motherfucker
in the room,
[Both men]
Accept no substitutes.
- [All laughing]
- [Man #2] That's a good point.
[Woman]
You shouldn't have seen that.
[Man #2]
It's kind of sad, really,
you know, the Russians,
I thought they... i thought
they wanted to be free.
- Be good.
- [Woman] Be like us.
[Man] All I know is
That comes from a country
that's successful with chess.
[Man #2, laughs]
Yeah, you all right?
- [Man] Come on.
- [Woman] I'm all right.
[Man #2]
All right, there you go.
- [Man] All right?
- Up, all right.
- [Woman] It's good, thank you.
- [Groans]
- [Man] You're welcome.
- [Gasps]
What?
- [Man #2, laughs] No...
- Oh, my God.
How do you like
them apples, huh?
- Aw, man, dude.
- [Laughs]
Chris, will you marry us?
- [Woman] Now?
- Yeah.
- Come on, come on.
- What?
- Let's do it.
- Shouldn't we save it?
Put your bags... babe,
we have the whole ceremony
To make it official,
this is, like, between us,
Friends, family,
it's all that matters, right?
Yeah, but I just...
-[Stutters] I wouldn't know
what to say, so.
- Just put your...
Screw it, I will help you.
Yes, okay, yes, he's right.
- I'm sorry.
- [Laughing]
- So, I say what...
- L-ladies and gentlemen,
- we are gathered here today.
- Right [Clears throat]
Ladies and gentlemen,
We are gathered here today
to celebrate
The marriage
of Daniel and Alicia.
[Daniel] Wedding
is a sacred institution.
[Chris]
Yeah, marriage
is a sacred institution
And it should not be
taken lightly.
[Daniel]
And we're not, so let's skip
Translation
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Citation
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"Landmine Goes Click" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2021. Web. 25 Feb. 2021. <https://www.scripts.com/script/landmine_goes_click_12211>.