Kingdom of Us Page #3

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Of course our brains are going to

make funny stories and make things up.

How can someone

just stop being there?

How can my dad just not be?

It was almost like

we weren't worth living for.

If your own dad

doesn't want to stick around...

then you can't be that great of a person.

I couldn't imagine any days

coming after that day.

I felt like we were just gonna be

frozen in time there.

Forever.

For years after he died,

I always thought it was probably a joke.

That he's not actually gone,

he was just pretending.

And that he'll still come back one day.

Like, sometimes I swear I see him

in the street,

and I think, "God, is that Dad?"

I don't wish for him to come back now,

'cause I know it's not gonna happen.

But I used to wish all the time that...

he'd come back, or like...

Actually I do still wish.

I do.

I sometimes pray at night that he'll

come in my dreams or something.

Or that he'll...

Just 'cause there's so many things

I want to ask him. And, like...

that I just want to hug him again

and hold his hand.

But I can't.

If he was here now,

what would you ask him?

Um...

I'd ask him to sing my song.

That he wrote.

Nikita?

Are you helping Mummy

make the evening meal?

I didn't always understand

what was going on when I was younger.

I think it's part of my autism.

So when people would talk to me,

I'd have to act like I knew

what I was saying...

and in my head, I was screaming.

It all just sounded like a big slur.

Give me a really big smile, Lorie.

I want to show Mummy and Daddy this.

Oh, Lorie, please give me smile.

I want to show Mummy and Daddy.

I know how to portray anger,

sadness, depressed, laughter, ecstatic...

But I don't know how to read them.

Nikita and Lorie, Pippa and

Osborn have been diagnosed with it.

- Um, my youngest sister.

- I'm six years old.

My birthday is...

It's like trying to

thread an eye of a needle,

but with really blurry glasses on.

You want to do something so bad,

but you just can't do it

'cause there's something holding you back.

Right, Mirie. Give me a smile.

People look at me and say,

"Um, you don't act autistic."

Well, a lot of the time

I'm trying to just be normal.

- What was that band called?

- Ozzy, stop!

Someday, somebody's gonna make you wanna

Turn around and say goodbye

Why don't you just let it

come naturally when you sing?

- Ozzy...

- Stop it!

Ozzy, are you doing this thing or not? No!

You wanted to be in it? No!

Are you going to be a performer? No!

Are you a scientist? Maybe! Shut up!

- Osborn? Ozzy? Ozzy?

- You know I'm right.

Listen, you do not spend

three and a half minutes on stage

just doing this...

No, you don't have to do that.

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