Just Getting Started

---

1

Welcome to the Villa Capri.

Located in the heart of the desert

is the resort community

that takes you to paradise.

You've worked hard all of your life,

and now...

No!

That son of a b*tch

is in Palm Springs.

He's basking

in the sun and playing golf.

While my husband

is drinking toilet wine in supermax!

Now the only thing that I want

from you for Christmas

is that rat's head in a box!

And make it look like it's an accident.

A few more days till Christmas

My favorite time of year

If we're lucky we'll see Santa

Rudolph and his eight reindeer

The snow keeps on fallin'

Sleddin' down the hill

Frosty's frozen on the lawn

Countin' down the days until

We gather 'round decorate the tree

Singin' holiday songs

Spices fill the air

Smell of cookies everywhere

- Hi, Duke.

- Hey.

A few more days to Christmas

The very best time of year

Firelight is glowing

On everything we hold dear

Just a few more days till Christmas

A few more days

Till Christmas is here

- Hi.

- Thank you.

Santa!

Oh! You're very generous, Duke.

Could I get you to sign

this receipt for me?

Sure thing. You just bought your way off

- the naughty list.

- Pleasure.

Rudolph and his eight reindeer

Firelight is glowing

On everything we hold dear

Just a few more days till Christmas

A few more days till Christmas

- Hey boss!

- Great job, guys. Very festive.

- Excuse me. This is Mr. Diver's spot.

- Perfect!

Mr. Diver make you wear those clothes?

Shine it up for me, Elf.

- Nice tree.

- Who is that in my parking spot?

Oh, that's a new resident,

Leo McKay.

Yeah, he just checked in

last night and he's actually very...

He's got a ten-gallon hat

on a five-gallon head.

Paid all cash.

Cash?

Well...

Let's invite him to my private poker game.

You got it.

I'll show him who's boss.

- In the nicest way.

- Of course.

- It's crooked.

- Hm?

- And there's a bald spot.

- So what? A lot of trees have flaws.

A lot of people have flaws.

You can put the bad side

of a tree against the wall.

What do you do

with the bad side of people?

- That's deep.

- Write it down.

Greetings, my darling.

Be a dear and get 5,000

out of petty cash for me.

Not a problem.

Got some stuff for you to sign here, sir.

Did you know that the builders

of the great cathedrals of Europe

would leave a small flaw

in the stone somewhere

just to acknowledge

that only God is perfect?

Where do you learn all this stuff?

College of life, my boy.

Well, we've got

the gardener's Christmas bonus,

the extra security cameras for your villa,

the bonus you asked me

to pay out to the entire staff,

live animals for the nativity scene.

The camels were a little expensive.

You can't a nativity without camels.

The Wise Men came from the East.

Got to give them respect.

Oh, and we have a letter

from the Rotary Club

confirming your acceptance

- of Man of the Year Honors...

- I can't accept. Can't accept.

I'm uncomfortable in the limelight.

You seem comfortable in the limelight.

My golf clubs! Oh, perfect, perfect!

So, I had them close the face

on the driver by a degree and a half.

You've been slicing a little recently.

Should take care of it.

Good, good, good.

I think I'll just run on out to the range

and let the big dogs eat.

Oh, Duke!

Hm?

- Five thou. Mm-hm.

- Thank you, my darlin'.

Duke, you checkin' me out?

Every delicious inch.

That's a nice tree you got this year.

Well, thank you,

but I'm a little concerned

that some of the residents

might not like a flocked tree.

Well, you know me, Duke.

I like a nice flockin' from time to time.

Rate this script:1.0 / 1 vote