Jumping the Broom Page #3

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to bring some baby pictures of Jason

so she can put 'em

in the wedding program.

She treating me like I'm her secretary,

not the mother-in-law to be!

She got Jason's nose all open, talking

about she gonna take him to China.

China! My Jason don't like

nothing sweet and sour.

This girl need to

have a little more respect for me!

Why are your panties all in a wad?

Didn't you tell me that Jason hadn't

met her family, either?

Heifer, whose side you on?

All this stuff going on,

her text messaging me

when she can pick up a telephone

and call me like I'm a human being.

I don't play this. Strike one.

Don't forget about

your anger management classes, Pam.

Calm down.

Honey, you gonna have

to go get back in line.

I'm going to lunch.

What?

Our guests arrive tomorrow,

so we will need to prepare every room.

All the linens need to be changed.

The floors need to sparkle.

-And sparkle they will, Mrs. Watson.

-Each of the guest rooms

needs to get a bouquet

of summer flowers.

-Yes, Mrs. Watson.

-And we have to assemble the gift boxes

-for all of our out-of-town guests.

-Yes, Mrs. Watson.

Where in hell are you?

Meeting ran long.

I'm on my way to the airport now.

Did you forget that we have 50 people

arriving here tomorrow

for our daughter's wedding?

Your sarcasm is unattractive.

Gregory, I cannot tolerate

one of your disappearing acts.

-I am not doing this alone.

-Yeah. Calm down.

You're not alone. Like I said,

I'm on my way to the airport.

Where were we?

All right. Where were we?

Yeah. Dissolution of property.

Gregg, I can't keep up this charade.

I've known Claudine for a long time,

and I do owe her a modicum of respect.

You have to tell her, or I will.

Jason!

-Wifey-to-be, wifey-to-be.

-What are you doing?

God, the stairs weren't good enough

for you?

I'm old school, babe. I got the horse

double-parked downstairs.

You know how they do it in the movies?

What's wrong, babe?

I'm just really nervous

about meeting your mom.

I need to know more about her.

-Like what?

-I don't know, just, you know, details.

Details are what make a person.

Like what's her taste in art?

Is she more MoMA or Met?

-Does she eat sushi or soul food?

-Baby...

Does she wanna play Mahalia Jackson

or Michael Jackson?

Breathe.

Okay. Let's see, my mom.

She's a very sweet...

Yeah?

...gentle, soft-spoken woman.

-Really?

-Just like you.

Come here.

-Oh, God.

-I know, I know.

Wait. Oh, my gosh.

Sorry, Jason, I'm sorry.

-I'm sorry, I just...

-I know.

-I can't do that.

-The promise you made with God, right?

-Yes, and you should respect it.

-I respect it, babe, but it ain't easy.

I mean, look at you. I mean, come on.

-Can we just keep that open?

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