Jeff, Who Lives at Home Page #3
Yeah? You're having
a business meeting at Hooters?
Yeah. Yes.
That's very classy.
Right. Well, business is business.
So, come on. Get in the car.
Hey! You don't need to grab onto me.
I'm a little bit conflicted right now,
that's all.
About what?
You're just gonna make fun of me, man.
Let's go. Try me.
I want to learn how you think
because I want to free my mind.
Let me try to explain it to you maybe
in terms that you would understand.
- Okay.
- This morning
I was meant to have
a business meeting with the Kevins.
And destiny. And now you're here
at this weird Hooters thing...
And so now I'm just trying
to figure out how to proceed.
What you just said
sounded like Yoda took acid
and stumbled into a business meeting.
You can make all the fun of Yoda
that you want,
Yoda would be f***ing killer
in a business meeting.
Whatever, man. Come on!
Let's go. Get in the Porsche.
Sh*t!
Hey, I think your Porsche
got a ticket, Pat.
Shut up, Jeff. Just get in the car.
This Porsche is tiny.
The Porsche is normal-sized.
You're a sasquatch.
I don't think so.
They came with the car so...
Check this out. You see where those
cars are stopping up ahead?
Yeah.
pretty soon, right?
Pat, slow down.
What? I can't hear you!
Bose surround sound!
Hey, stop it, dude. This is not funny.
- Count to three and I'll stop.
- Pat, please stop.
Count of three! One! Two!
- Pat, look out!
- Three!
Curb! Curb!
Sh*t! Yes!
Will you please stop the car?
It handles better at high speeds!
- Stop the car!
- Shut up!
Tree! Tree!
Pat?
F***!
Wow. Yeah, that's real bad.
Oh, sh*t.
What the f***?
He looks mad.
Are you on drugs?
How many beers have you had?
Shut up, Jeff. Shut up.
Did you not see that damn tree?
Whatever you do, don't say a word.
Stay in the f***ing car.
I am fine, yes. Thank you for asking.
Burt, should we call an ambulance?
Hi. There was a pedestrian child
in the street
and in order to avoid killing it,
I had to swerve
and maneuver onto your sidewalk,
of my vehicle
and I've hit your tree here.
We can see that.
Do you think we're blind?
No. Of course not.
I just would like to apologize.
Is he okay?
Yeah, he's fine. Just a little stunned.
I think that one's hurt.
Maybe we should call the police.
He's fine. He's okay.
That child's not moving.
Ma'am, he's okay.
Jeff, will you get out of the car?
Yeah. Get out of the car.
Show her that you're fine.
See? Live and limber.
- Baby, are you sure you're all right?
- Look at that.
- I am fine, thank you.
- Look at that. Good as new.
You remind me of my grandson.
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"Jeff, Who Lives at Home" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 4 May 2024. <https://www.scripts.com/script/jeff,_who_lives_at_home_11223>.
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