Jackass 2.5 Page #5

I was pretty excited to shoot.

And the first thing I shot in Russia was

when we went to Saint Petersburg

and there was some Russian

sex museum/prostate exam clinic.

"Oh great! That sounds great!

Yeah, let's go shoot it tomorrow! Great!"

But then when we got there,

they told me what they wanted me to do.

Holy...

You're just going to go face-first.

-You can put off your trousers.

-You want my trousers?

Yes. And we shall observe you.

Come here, and put on your knees.

-Okay. Do I need to lose the boxers?

-Just... Just...

Sometime later. Just... Now you are...

-Okay.

-Knees here.

-Okay.

-Knees here.

And elbows. Elbows here.

And also,

you have to put off your trousers.

-Just enough.

-No Sacagawea.

Just enough. These nurses

may do the massage of prostate.

-What? What?

-Yeah.

So... No, wait a second!

Why is he doing it?

-It's the...

-lt is a special doctor procedure.

It may... Only the doctor can

do the massage of prostate.

Not nurse, but doctor.

No, no, no, no.

You guys just did

the f***ing Texas switch.

You told me the nurse was going to...

-Rectal examination for prostate...

-I don't care about...

I don't care about a massage

from the doc.

But, it must be done by doctor.

Calm down.

-There's no calming down.

-No, no. There is. You're fine.

-That's too far.

-No, no, no.

- All right, he's got to stop. It hurts.

-Oh, my God!

Does it feel good?

-No, it doesn't feel good.

-It's a massage.

Let's... Don't make eye contact.

Tell the doc not to make eye contact.

-Just relax, and try to enjoy it.

-Relax. Try to enjoy, yes?

That will do. That will do. That's all.

-That's good.

-That's all.

Oh, my God. He put two digits in you.

-Come on, that felt good, right?

-You are the champion.

-You are.

-Boy, did I get roped into this one.

-You are the champion.

-I won nothing!

You're the champion.

I'm having a great time here.

-Am I okay?

-Okay, okay.

It's okay. There is no big problem,

but some...

Little loose in your prostate.

He's loose.

After I was anally probed

by a device and a full-grown man...

Hello, ma'am.

...I...

There was an idea for me to go

donate sperm, so they could

you know, assess

my virility.

So, in this room, you are to masturbate,

and to collect your sperm for analysis.

For analysis. Please follow the nurse.

Hi.

How many times have we joked around

about going to a clinic together?

You guys aren't coming in here.

You guys are out.

That's a very small cup.

Yeah, but... Okay, I'll try to hit it.

And so I went in a room,

and tried to, you know,

And so I went in a room,

and tried to, you know,

give them the sperm they wanted.

But it's tough when you got

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