Irma La Douce Page #5

but I'll do better next time.

- You will, huh?

- Definitely.

Hello?

About the little one - don't worry,

we'll feed her around here.

Thank you, but none of that

horse meat you give police dogs.

- She's got kidney stones, remember?

- Hey, Patou!

- The inspector wants to see you.

- The inspector? Did you hear that?

- The inspector wants to see me.

- Maybe they've given you a medal.

Do you think so? No, not on my first day.

- In there.

- All right.

Come in!

Officer Patou reporting.

You sent for me... sir.

- So you're the new man?

- Yes, sir.

I've been wondering what you looked like.

- Well, you've seen me before.

- I have?

Remember? At the Hotel Casanova.

What was I doing at the Hotel Casanova?

- I don't know, but I was raiding the place.

- You were. Who authorised the raid?!

I was using my own judgement, sir. It

was an obvious violation of section 34.

We can get a conviction,

now we have you as a witness.

And look at your uniform! It's disgraceful!

There were 16 of them in the van,

and they were resisting arrest, sir.

And I was resisting, too.

I didn't lose my head,

just my gun, but I got it back.

- Take off your cap when talking to me!

- Yes, sir.

Hey, chri, you oughta

get outta those wet clothes.

I'll help you.

Look who's here.

~ Little birdie, pretty little birdie ~

~ Little birdie, fly away with me ~

A glass of Vichy, right?

Cognac, please, to get the taste

of feathers out of my mouth.

~ Little birdie, pretty little birdie ~

~ Little birdie, fly away with me ~

- You off duty?

- Permanently.

- I've been bounced from the police force.

- You don't say?

Had the goods on me. Insubordination,

accepting bribes and a missing button.

So they took away my medal,

threw me out of the barracks.

Reminds me of when I was drummed out

of the army. Marrakech, you know.

I was a colonel in the foreign legion.

Before or after you were

a professor of economics?

No, in between I was a croupier

in Monte Carlo, but that's another story.

Oh. Well... one more.

So, what's your next move?

I've been lookin' for a job,

applied to all the bureaus -

customs inspection, sanitation - but once

you've been dishonourably discharged...

...they won't even let you

clean the sewers.

I hate to see a young man like you

take a defeatist attitude.

The world is full of opportunities.

Just look around.

There's one-armed Jojo,

used to be a safecracker...

...till he put a little too much

nitroglycerin in a vault.

And Casablanca Charlie. Five years ago

he walked in with holes in his shoes...

...and a pocketful of dirty postcards.

Or take Hippolyte the Ox, used to be

a purse-snatcher around the market.

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