If I Had My Way Page #5

a child. We... Why, we can't afford it.

For once

you're using good judgment.

Despite your opinion, dear,

my judgment is usually sound.

Your knowledge of financial matters,

Jarvis, is hardly spectacular.

Coming from you,

that's very funny.

A man would have to get money

out of a pump

to keep up with your crazy

spending. My spending?

Why do I spend? Only to

keep up appearances for you.

And now you propose to take on the

additional burden of this child.

Who proposes? I'm not going

to raise anybody's child.

Much less the daughter

of a brother

I haven't even seen

or heard from in 15 years.

Well, you just can't ignore

it. What are you going to do?

I don't know. I don't know

what I'm going to do.

But I've got to do something!

My, what a friendly city.

Everybody's smiling. I like that.

Yeah, well, you're safe

until they start laughing.

Oh, look.

Say, Buzz, even the squirrels

are different in New York.

Yeah. They streamline them.

Hey, look at this. There you are,

Pat. What do you think of her?

Ain't she cute? I bet she's

Charlie McCarthy's sweetheart.

Buzz, I don't have to wear

things like that, do I?

I'd look like a cream puff.

Well, they don't look like cream

puffs. They look like little ladies.

That's the way you should look.

I want your relatives to like you

when they meet you for the first time.

That's right. If you don't like a

man when you meet him the first time,

make sure the first time is

the last time.

Now that's... That's an

old Swedish proverb. I know.

Come on. Come on.

We have an excellent selection here. I

think you'll find everything you want.

Look, Pat. That looks like the hat I

wore when I was a little boy in Stockholm.

Yep, came here on a slow boat.

Shall we look at dresses first?

Well, we're a little in the dark

about what the well-dressed

young ladies are wearing.

Why don't you take over, huh?

Very well. Come with me, dear.

Here, Axel, will you take care

of Crack, please?

Come on, little squirrel.

Miss Corbett, is Mrs.

Taylor's daughter with you?

No, she isn't. I think Mrs.

Taylor's chauffeur called for her.

Thank you.

I wonder how Pat will look when

she's dressed like a little girl.

That's simple,

like a little girl.

That looks lovely. As far as I'm

concerned, they're all terrible.

Well, we have some others that

are slightly less dramatic.

Try this one, Mrs. DeLacey.

It absolutely defeats me.

Some man with a perverted sense of humor

must be designing women's hats today.

They all make you look

ridiculous. Well, Mrs. DeLacey...

This is the end. This one makes

me look like a fruit salad.

We have the accessories, too. There

are gloves and a bag that go with it.

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