I Want a Dog for Christmas, Charlie Brown

[CHIRPING]

[ALL GIGGLING]

Christmas decorations are getting

more lifelike every year, Charlie Brown.

I thought your little brother, ReRun,

was coming with you?

Our mom decided to take him with her

on her bicycle...

...to do some Christmas shopping.

Pedal hard, Mom.

Harder. That's the way.

Look out for the lawn mower.

Great, we're out of the garage.

When it comes to riding

on the back of Mom's bicycle...

...I'm a white-knuckle flier.

Look out for the tree.

[BICYCLE BELL RINGS]

Look out for the fence.

[CAR HONKS]

[SINGS]

Jingle bells

Look out!

[SINGS]

Jingle bells

Aah, look out!

[SINGS]

Jingle all the way

Singing doesn't help at all.

Those bike rides always wipe me out.

I've got to find some way to relax.

[DOORBELL RINGS]

Could you ask your dog

to come out and play?

He's resting.

Go find something else to do.

Go home and read a book.

I can't do that.

Well, that's too bad.

Find something you know how to do.

Well, I know how to play with a dog.

Someone at school today

asked me if I had an older brother...

...who dragged a blanket around.

"No," I replied. "I'm an only child."

Then someone said,

"But don't you have a weird older sister?"

"No," I insisted. "I'm an only child."

And so I go, day after day,

dodging questions from curious outsiders.

What else did they say?

Some of the guys over at the playground

were discussing crabby sisters.

Guess what, I won.

They all agree that I have

the crabbiest sister in the neighborhood.

I'm a celebrity.

You think I'm crabby now?

Wait until I'm 40 or 50.

What about when you're 90?

Then I'll be real nice.

The trouble with being a little kid...

...is no one ever asks your opinion

about anything.

Why don't you stop talking

and just go to bed?

Are you asking for my opinion?

What are you writing, ReRun?

This is how I have it figured.

If there are three kids in a family,

each kid has 33 and a third rights.

Wrong, little brother.

It's 90 percent for me

and 5 percent for you.

And 5 percent for you.

I better check those figures again.

We're a family.

And in a family, each person has a job.

Here, write down what you think

your job could be.

How do you spell "watching"?

Watching?

That'll be my job, watching TV.

Remember, ReRun...

...having an older sister is like having

a compass to guide you through life.

Is that true?

I'm not here.

How can I be expected to live

in the same house with two brothers?

What kind of question was that?

Big sisters are the crabgrass

in the lawn of life.

I'm your younger brother...

...and I don't suck my thumb,

and I don't cling to a blanket for security.

Hooray for you.

As the years go by, you'll probably develop

a real resentment toward me.

And you'll find different ways

to get even.

What would you do

if I kicked those over?

Probably nothing at the moment.

But years from now,

after you're married...

...and you and your husband

want me to cosign a note...

...so you can buy a new house,

I'll refuse.

[GROANS]

Younger brothers learn to think fast.

If you're the third child in a family...

...and your brother and sister

are really weird...

...I wonder if it's possible for that

third child to develop an immunity.

An immunity to all the bad things

that happen in a family.

To that innocent third child

who might...

[THUD]

RERUN:

So much for immunity.

[BELL RINGS]

Wow, what a project.

Color these pictures, cut and paste,

draw those trees.

More cutting, more pasting.

What a learning experience.

[WOMAN MUMBLING]

Yes, ma'am, you've done it again.

[WOMAN MUMBLING]

When she's happy, we're happy.

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