I Really Hate My Job Page #5

Then the phone rang.

It was his wife.

She was in hospital,

in labor with

their first child.

So he was with his mistress.

Yes.

So I told them

we were closing.

What time was it?

- Around 11:
00.

- But that's when we close.

But they didn't know that,

did they, Suzie?

No.

This... was made

by a street cleaner

who spent his life

photographing snowflakes.

Well, that's very good.

Isn't it?

[sighs]

[chuckles]

Are you enjoying art school?

- Oh, my God, yes.

- What is it you're working on?

Well...

mainly portraits of the hands

of people I have loved

and a video of people

trying to remember

the lyrics of

their favorite songs.

But for my final year show

I'm thinking of

filling the gallery

with tiny photographs

of precious objects

you have to really peer at

to see properly.

Simona said

my slippers repulsed her.

That's not good.

I'm really glad that she

felt she could tell me.

- [door opens]

- May I help you?

First orders of the night:

no starters, two chicken,

one salmon.

Can you believe

who's coming to dinner?

Virginia Woolf?

No. Table for four at 9:00

in the name of Danny Huston.

- As in the actor?

- As in the actor.

He's a very

versatile actor.

[Abi]

I didn't know you were

a movie buff, Rita.

Oh, I like well-crafted,

morally complex movies

with strong narratives

and powerful acting.

Who wouldn't?

Stop it.

Madonna promised me

no more bookings.

- This is an exception.

- Why?

- He is an amazing actor.

- Wow.

What do you got

against actors?

- They're like tribute bands.

- Excuse me?

They speak someone else's words,

interpret someone else's ideas,

and try to look

like someone else.

- The joy.

- They're faded copies

of a vibrant original.

Blah, blah, blah,

blah, blah.

What is the justice

in George Clooney

getting millions

for playing, say, a doctor

when real doctors get

a fraction of that?

Or a cook.

How much did Julia Roberts

get for Mystic Pizza?

More than I get, I bet.

Julia Roberts was

the waitress, not the cook.

Yeah, okay, whatever.

Two chicken, one salmon.

Most of the world doesn't

even have clean water.

That doesn't mean

we shouldn't drink it.

Has there ever been

a film that truly showed

the life of a woman?

That would be

a really boring film.

Take the bread.

You know, you guys

really need to lighten up.

[banging, squealing]

Bloody fans.

Order, table 10.

Two soups,

one linguini,

one jamon.

Table eight ready?

Oh, it is hot in here.

Madonna, you promised

no more bookings.

Sorry, Alice.

It's only four.

Can't turn down

celebrities.

- I am not a cook.

- Alice, you gotta remember

it's very good for

the restaurant to have

well-known people eat here.

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