Hurlyburly Page #3

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I'll do the generals.

Good. Anything else

we need to cover?

Oh, I was wondering.

You came in this morning about...

something like 6:02.

So dinner must have

been successful.

I mean, these vibes.

Must have been serious.

I mean, sustaining, right?

Right. Yeah. You know.

Or does it mean that...

and I'm just trying to get

the facts straight here...

does it mean that you...

f***ed her?

Right.

Did I f*** Darlene?

Last night?

Tiffany, can you confirm lunch?

I'm on my way out.

What I mean is...

things happen.

But if this bothers you...

I don't have to see her again.

I mean that.

It's not worth our friendship.

You know that.

Mickey, the last thing I want...

is to interfere

with any possibility...

for happiness in your life.

Believe me, Eddie,

this was not a possibility...

for happiness in my life.

It was in mine!

It was such a possibility

in mine!

I think maybe

you might have things...

a little out of proportion.

Yeah, so? Do me a breakdown.

I think that maybe

she's not as dynamite a lady...

as you might think, that's all.

F*** you!

Go!

You always go a little crazy

about women.

You want to let it go?

Just let it go!

I think it's important you

think about the possibility...

You won't think about it?

Are you bad-mouthing Darlene

to get off the hook?

Don't think you can do that!

It's not that

I don't understand.

It's that I do understand.

I'm just not so f***ing

sophisticated...

as to be

beyond the entire thing.

You know what I mean?

My heart is broken.

Absolutely.

You didn't tell us

you got married.

Oh, her?

No, I found her on the elevator.

You want her?

What do you mean?

I mean, it's too crowded...

Artie, the pool.

Right. She wants to go swimming

in the pool.

You do? Hi, I'm Mickey.

I'd love to watch you swimming

in our pool.

Great, Mickey.

I'm Donna.

Cute, Artie. Very cute.

So, you want her, huh?

You keep saying that, Artie.

You know, I was going out

for coffee this morning...

and she's on

the goddamn elevator.

I come back. There she is.

An hour later,

that's a coincidence.

But then I come back

from lunch...

she's on the elevator.

She's living in the elevator.

She said her boyfriend

tried to kill her...

so she was staying

off the street.

Why'd he try to kill her?

She said he was moody.

So I took her in,

then figured I don't need her.

And maybe you guys need her...

because I figured, you know,

hey, you're desperate guys.

So I figured on the way over

to the studio I'd drop her by...

and you can keep her

like a little care package.

So you're giving her to us?

What are we supposed

to do with her?

He needs an instruction manual.

Does she come with one?

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