Hot Tub Time Machine 2 Page #3

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She's one of the good ones, man.

Come on. Let's get a drink.

Jeez. The place

is like a deathtrap, huh?

Just lousy with statues, and the...

Not a lot of coats, right?

Not a lot of coats.

Can I take your jacket?

No, no, no. I'm actually

kind of "on the job" tonight.

It's my dad's party, he runs Lougle.

What do you do?

You know, I'm just

kind of a Jack-of-all-trades.

- So you're the butler.

- No!

Come on. Do I look like a butler to you?

You look exactly like a butler.

God damn, it's good to see you, man.

You, too, buddy.

Man. That tub, huh?

Really turned it all around.

It's the best thing that

ever happened to me.

You ever wish we could

go back for one more dip?

You know, tweak some things?

Use time travel

for more important reasons.

Too bad the tub is gone.

Yeah.

Too bad.

F***.

Sorry.

What the f***? Lou...

Nick-nack-paddywhack!

Give a dog a what?

Gary Winkle.

Look at this.

Look, Lou spilled his drink on me

so I don't have to talk to you.

Good looking out.

Okay, just laying it all out there.

Where are me and you right now

on a scale of, like,

"dinner and a movie"

to "tropical sex vacation"?

We're on the

"It's never, ever going to happen"

part of the scale.

- So, like a four.

- One and a half.

Minus the half.

What are you selling, Gary?

What? No love for Gary Winkle?

Okay, but it is a sound

investment this time.

I'm telling you, man.

No, no, no. Wait, wait, wait.

It is only 12 blocks from the river.

Pristine lot.

You can build an office tower,

nightclub, combo, whatever the f***.

I don't care.

Okay, I get it, man, I get it.

I get it. I'm a loser.

Okay, I'm always going to be a loser.

I'm not like you guys.

I didn't magically turn it all around

after that ski trip.

All I got is this piece of land,

and I know it's a piece of sh*t, okay?

But it's... It can be our piece of sh*t.

Not interested. Pass.

We are live!

Coming to you

from the heart of the Bayou.

At the height of his career,

worth 2.3 billion dollars,

introducing Lou "the Violator"

Dorchen!

We've grown quite a bit

over the years, haven't we?

Some of us have achieved our dreams.

Others have found new dreams to chase.

You know, I bet...

I bet there's not a person

in this room who,

given the chance

to do it all over again,

would do it any differently. Am I right?

Am I right?

And if you believe that,

if you truly believe that

in your heart of hearts,

well, then,

you're all a bunch of f***ing morons!

Genius.

Life is about do-overs, okay?

And if you see your second chance

peeking its dick around

a corner, snatch it!

Grab it! Take my advice.

Look at the people

you love most in this world,

then you tell them

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