Hot Rod Page #3

you could even imagine.

Okay.

Here we go.

Rod! Rod.

Welcome aboard.

I'm kind of grumpy today, dude.

I didn't get a lot of sleep last night.

I was having those dreams again.

You know how it's just me in a castle.

I gotta fight, like, a thousand wizards.

The only way to beat them is to punch

them as hard as I can in their faces.

And then, when I'm done,

all their little wizard wives came out

and wanted me

just to have sex with them.

Which is kind of weird.

Hey, look at this, huh?

Hey, everybody.

I've got some awesome news.

We have a new crew member today.

Denise.

Hi, everyone.

So, I thought it'd be fun

if we all went around

and said our name

and a little something about ourselves.

I'll start. My name is Rod,

and I like to party.

All right, Dave. You're up.

Hi. My name is Dave,

and I like to party.

No, Dave. I just said that I party, so

maybe do something different from me.

My name is Dave,

and I am the stunt man.

You know what? Let's move on.

Rico, you're up.

Hello. I'm Rico, and I like to party.

Yeah. Rico?

What did I just say to Dave?

- Who?

- Dave.

- I like to party. I'm Rod.

- No. You're Kevin.

Right. Kevin. I party.

No. No, you don't.

Okay, nobody parties but me.

Yes. And we party.

- No.

- Yeah, just Rod.

- Yes.

- And me.

- No! I'm the only one who parties.

- I'm pretty sure I've partied before.

No, Kevin, I know for a fact

you don't party, okay? You do not party.

- You're right. Dave's the party guy.

- Sweet.

Oh, my God. Shut up, okay?

I'm just gonna do it for you.

Denise. This is the crew.

Dave's the mechanic.

Rico makes the ramps.

And Kevin is

team manager/videographer.

None of them party. Right?

Got it?

Okay.

Let's party.

Pools are perfect

for holding water, man.

Man, I don't really know about having

a girl on the team, man.

All right, Rico, listen.

There's an ancient Italian maxim

that roughly translates to,

"He who is resistant to change

is destined to perish."

So, why don't you try to open up

that mind of yours? You know?

It's like, look at Kevin. I mean, he...

Real mature, man.

Yeah, don't you ever tell me

how to live my life again.

Okay, you guys.

If I'm gonna jump 15 buses, my body's

gonna have to be in top physical form.

Which brings us to our first exercise.

Lung strengthening.

You guys are gonna hold me

under water for 40 seconds.

That's 20 less than a minute.

My body's natural instinct

is gonna be to resist.

But, no matter what, don't let up.

If there's any problem at all,

I will ring this bell.

Hey, Dave. Mom wants to know

if your friends want some grape punch.

Maggie! Don't even ask. Just bring it.

Come on.

Don't just stare at me! Go! Thank you.

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