Honeymoon

Synopsis: Young newlyweds Paul and Bea travel to remote lake country for their honeymoon. Shortly after arriving, Paul finds Bea wandering and disoriented in the middle of the night. As she becomes more distant and her behavior increasingly peculiar, Paul begins to suspect something more sinister than sleepwalking took place in the woods.
Director(s): Leigh Janiak
Production: Magnolia Pictures/Magnet Releasing
  5 nominations.
 
IMDB:
5.7
Metacritic:
65
Rotten Tomatoes:
73%
R
Year:
2014
87 min
$9,168
Website
333 Views


I guess I'm

the first one to do this.

Well, I'm not really sure

what I'm supposed to say.

I'm now a wife.

Okay,

wedding video.

Let me introduce you

to our delicious food.

We got veggie korma,

lamb curry, samosas.

Oh, I am sitting

inside a tent of sorts,

because it is inside a tent

similar to this one

where you proposed.

For our first date,

Bea chose an Indian restaurant,

you know,

one of those little places on Sixth Street

with the colored lights

and the fiber-optic lamps.

Yum, except that

halfway through the meal,

I start feeling

my stomach gurgle

in this horrible

food-poisoning-type way,

and I didn't even

have time to lie to her.

I spend 20 minutes in the

dirty restaurant toilet

and the rest of the night

on Bea's bathroom floor,

because I couldn't make it

to the subway,

let alone Brooklyn.

Well, we'd been planning

on going camping upstate

for weeks,

but, as you know, I got sick,

so we couldn't go.

I thought you were upset,

because you were

acting really weird,

but then you... you built,

like, this tent

over our bed out of blankets,

and we made s'mores

on the stove,

and then inside the fort

on our bed,

you said, "Bea, this was

supposed to be romantic

"and under the stars,

not sheets,

"but you make me the happiest.

Will you marry me?"

And now we're married.

So this, this is our,

"F*** you, Indian food."

You tried to keep us apart,

but f*** you.

We win.

So we didn't get

a regular wedding cake.

We decided on something that

was special for us instead.

Mm-hmm, special

and cheap.

What?

No,

I think some people

are annoyed by no cake.

Who cares?

It's our wedding,

huh?

Before, I was alone,

but now I'm not.

I love you, honeybee.

Whew.

It's not fancy.

Is it okay?

Do you like it?

Here's what I see...

ot the city,

woods.

Mm-hmm. I just want

it to be perfect.

And I just want to be with you.

Blehh!

All right, come on.

So this is the famous

family cottage.

Mm.

Wait, wait, wait.

What? What? What? What?

Not so fast, okay?

First, the grand tour.

So this is the living room.

Watch your step.

You may notice a slight tilt.

Uh-huh. This is

definitely unsafe.

Oh, yeah?

Well, you're unsafe.

You're unsafe.

You're unsafe.

Here we have a TV

and VCR from 1991.

Uh-huh.

Well, I mean,

who needs cell service

or Internet

when you can keep busy

watching your favorite VHS tape?

Over here, we have the kitchen,

complete with, yes,

a radioactive microwave

and an oven that probably

still uses hot coals.

You may be noticing a theme.

Mm-hmm.

Mm-hmm.

I want to have sex with you.

Bzz. Change is bad.

Looks like a sign.

No, looks like bad wiring.

Yeah.

This is the bear room.

Mm-hmm.

Mm-hmm.

Very good.

Yeah.

And, uh...

why is it called the bear room?

No.

This is the bathroom.

It's green,

very green.

This is, uh...

This is where you almost

drowned playing submarine.

Yeah.

Huh.

Yeah.

You're my favorite.

Which one is ours?

Mm, next door.

The woods room...

Right.

because it has windows

facing...

the woods.

It's dark and scary out there.

It's dark and scary in here.

What's with the ducks?

Ah, they're fake and hollow,

empty inside.

I used to hide things

in 'em with I was little.

Oh?

Yeah.

What are you hiding under here?

My very superspecial

honeymoon nightgown.

I love you, honeybee.

Mm, bzz.

Hmm.

Sorry.

You are pretty creepo.

I was done sleeping.

Look what I found.

Mm.

"Dear ducks,

"my name is

Mallard P. Quack.

"I am not a real duck.

Stay away.

Quack, quack..."

Honk, quack,

quack, quack, honk.

Did we get milk?

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Phil Graziadei

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Submitted on August 05, 2018

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    "Honeymoon" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2023. Web. 29 Jan. 2023. <https://www.scripts.com/script/honeymoon_10128>.

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