Hobo With A Shotgun

Synopsis: A vigilante homeless man pulls into a new city and finds himself trapped in urban chaos, a city where crime rules and where the city's crime boss reigns. Seeing an urban landscape filled with armed robbers, corrupt cops, abused prostitutes and even a pedophile Santa, the Hobo goes about bringing justice to the city the best way he knows how - with a 20-gauge shotgun. Mayhem ensues when he tries to make things better for the future generation. Street justice will indeed prevail.
Genre: Action, Comedy, Horror
Director(s): Jason Eisener
Production: Magnolia Releasing
  1 win & 4 nominations.
Rotten Tomatoes:
86 min

Spare some change?

Come on!

If you wanna make my money you

gotta get rougher than this.


Hey you!

You wanna get in on this?

Come On.

Ten dollars.

Ten dollars.

Come on!


f*** you then!

You'll never make

money without me.

Alright, alright

let's see some blood.

That's it.

That's it.

Go damn it,

HELP me,

they're coming after me!


Lady, please help me,

get this off me!

They're gonna f***ing kill me.

You've gotta help me here!


get this off my neck.

Get back,

don't leave me!



Please you've

gotta help me here.

If you don't help me my hand's

coming off my f***ing body.

Please just untie me,

that's it.

Oh brother of mine.

Look at you now.

Boys. This isn't

a joke anymore.

You weren't planning on

leaving town without

saying goodbye were ya?

Yeah, we've been looking

all over for you.

I was gettin' worried.

I'm your uncle.

I've known you since

you were f***in' babies!

This cocksucker gave me the

shittiest Christmas presents.

I hate Christmas.

You f***ing brats!

F*** off!

Drake, stop this,

we're family!

It's the rules,


You're our lucky contestant.



Don't put me in there.

Show 'em how to play boys.

Slick. You we're always

my favorite nephew

I swear to God

I mean that.

Get your feet in that

f***ing deathhole!


Ivan my boy.

I want everybody here

to appreciate this.

Time to get the show

on the road boy-yo.

Alright you f***ing androids.

My father's got something

he wants you all to see.

And I swear, anybody looks

away for even a second,

I'll make them wish they

we're f***ing aborted.

Ladies and Gentlemen,

welcome to the Drake Show.

Tonight's special episode

is going to be filled with

thrills, and chills, and

my own personal favorite.

Lots and lots of

that red sh*t

that flows inside

all our bodies.


CHEER you f***ers!

Thank you.

How can you watch

and not do anything?

They're going to

f***ing kill me here!

Somebody say something!

Don't just stand there!

You know, ever since our

mother brought Logan home

from the hospital, I knew

he was a f***ing coward.

I'll leave town!

You'll never f***ing

see me again.

Just please, I can't

feel my legs, Drake.

He wants mercy from the Drake.

From the Drake...

And he should know

better than anybody...

mercy ain't my style.

What do you want from me?

Logan is no longer my brother.

Our relationship

has been severed.

And now he's all

alone in this world,

with nothing but a

barbed wire noose

around his neck.

You can't let him

do this!

It's not just MY

life he's ruining.


Help me.


You should have started

beggin' a long time ago.

I've never enjoyed

listening to you

as much as I do right now.

You're a f***ing animal Drake!

You're a shitty f***ing

weird little animal.

The way I see it, I'm a

f***ing miracle worker,

because I am going

to make it rain!

Gun it,


Well, can you feel

your legs now?

Can ya?


Was there something else

you wanted to say to me?

Well, thanks for tuning

in ladies and gentlemen.

Who knows,

maybe next time

one of you will be

our lucky contestant.

Enjoy the ride,

my favorite f***in' uncle.

Go the f*** home everybody!

And don't forget

to wash your d*cks!



I dare you to lick his dick.

Woo! Woo!

You bastards!

Hey Slick, you gotta

check this out man.

F***in awesome.

Hey, where the

f*** are you going?

Business with dad.


Hey Otis.

What are ya playing?

I forgot Slick.

I spent all my

money in the arcade.

You owe me money.

You're burning me,


Let me call my mom! I can

get my allowance early!

That must be some

hell of an allowance.

Come on man,

he's a kid,

let it slide.

What did you say to me?

You heard me.

Let it slide.


The only thing

I'm gonna let slide,

is my dick in your p*ssy.

Hey, Otie -

where ya going?

Don't hurt me IVAN!

Shut the f*** up!

Did that hurt?


You want to know how to

never feel pain again?

No I

don't want any more!

Does everybody wanna know

how to never

feel pain again?

Come on Otis!

Have at it!

You know how I can tell

I'm making you wet?


Cause you're making

my dick thirsty.

What are you supposed to be?

Some kind of bad ass

murderer or something?


Does that frighten you?

If you've got money to

spend, nothing frightens me.

Baby, I've got all

kinds of money with

your name written

all over it.

Well what are

you waiting for?

Let's go.


Nobody messes

with you, do they?

Not if they give a

f*** about living.

So how many people

have you killed?

What am I?

A mathematician?

You're sexy...

You're f***ing right.

Are we gonna f***,

or what?

What the hell?

That's your ride b*tch.

Come on.

This was not

our f***ing deal!

I'm paying you good money.

You're gonna love this!

Let the girl go Punk.

I'm making a citizen's arrest.

And who the f*** are you?

Put the knife away kid

or I'll use it to

cut welfare cheques

from your rotten skin.

Well you better cut

one to Mother Theresa

so you can give it

to her while she's

finger banging you in hell.

Shut you filthy mouth!

Mother Theresa is

a God damn saint!

Serves you right.

What did you think?

He was gonna put a

ring on your finger?

Lock him up with

the Sodomites.

And get me the god-damned

chief of police now.

Good day sir.

No, no please,

take a seat.

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John Davies

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Submitted on August 05, 2018

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