Here Comes the Groom Page #4

to be told about

those interesting things called

"the facts of life

- Well, tell me all.

- I read a book last night called

What Every Young Girl

Should Know.

And I was amazed at the things that

apparently go on with normal people.

So I intend to try them on my piano,

every one of them.

In other words, I intend to get

married... to get married...

- Steady. Steady, girl.

- ...to get married...to get married...

But not to you, darling.

So stop trembling and call the blood

back into your ashen little cheeks.

I wouldn't frighten you

for the world.

I remember too well how sick

you looked three years ago

when we went down to the City Hall

to get our marriage license.

I also remember how quickly

you recovered

when our mutual friend,

your boss and fellow conspirator,

Mr. George Degnan,

came through with that

miraculous Paris assignment

that permitted you to escape

- at the very last second.

- Good old George.

You told me tenderly to get a job

and wait for you. I did.

- Good.

- I've been waiting three years now.

Waiting and running.

Yes, running around desks,

staying true to you.

- Good girl!

- I'm tired of running,

so I'm gonna slow down.

In fact, I'm gonna stand still

and the first egghead

who catches me can have me!

I was born to be a mother,

not a poised pencil!

And do you realize that if you were

half the man you think you are,

I'd be the mother of a brood by now?

There'd be one in the fifth grade...

In the fifth grade...in the fifth grade...

In the fifth grade...in the fifth grade...

- Look out, wait a minute.

- In the fifth grade...

...and another in the second grade

and maybe even et cetera, et cetera.

- Such are the fortunes of love

- Oh, they're twins?

n the newspaper business.

Icannot, however, permit myself

to stare childless

at the prospect of old age

in a home for spinsters!

So I have been walking around

windy corners lately.

Emmy.

In other words, Peter Garvey,

we're through!

- Finished! Kaput!

- Kaput, yet.

So good day, good evening,

goodbye and...

- Bon voyage.

- Drop dead, my dear stinker!

And may you stew in your

ink-stained bachelorhood

the rest of your selfish,

carefree days!

She still loves me.

P. S. Knowing how conceited you are,

I know what you're thinking now,

and this is to inform you that I do not

stiff Jove you... Stiff Jove you...

- Encore.

- Still love you...still love you...

- Once more. Kid's mad for me.

- Still love you...

Still love you. . . still love you...

Hey, Bobby?

You want me, Pete?

- What grade are you in?

- Fifth.

Well, what do you know!

The fifth?

Attention, please.

Attention, please.

Announcing the arrival of

Flight Number Seven,

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