Hannah Gadsby: Nanette Page #3

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I said, "No...

No, Grandma.

No, I don't have time for boyfriends."

Plural.

Confident, wasn't I? "But

if I had time, heaps!"

And she said, "Ah, well, you never know.

One day you might walk around

the corner, and there he'll be!"

"Mr. Right," she called him.

And I have been approaching

every corner with caution

since then.

No offense to Mr. Right,

if you are out there.

But you're also Mr. Very Very Too Late.

'Cause I've done quite a lot of

work on this lesbian situation here

and I don't imagine I've got a

tight turning circle on identity.

Imagine the feedback.

Not enough lesbian content.

Do you know what I reckon my problem is?

I don't lesbian enough.

Not in the scheme of

my existence. Not a lot.

I mean, I keep my hand in.

Bit of lesbian content there.

I'll be sprinkling it

throughout the show.

Keep your feedback forms to yourselves.

No, I mean, if you were to plot

my week, I don't... Not a lot.

Not a lot of lesbian-ing... gets done.

I cook dinner more. I cook

dinner way more than I lesbian.

But nobody every introduces me

as "that chef comedian," do they?

Not enough lesbian content.

I should quit. I'm a disgrace.

What sort of comedian can't

even make the lesbians laugh?

Every comedian ever.

That's a good joke, isn't it? Classic.

It's bulletproof, too.

Very clever, because it's funny...

because it's true.

The only people who don't think

it's funny... are us lezzers...

But we've got to laugh...

because if we don't...

proves the point.

Checkmate.

Very clever joke.

I didn't write that.

That is not my joke.

It's an old... An oldie.

Oldie but a goldie. A classic.

It was written, you know, well

before even women were funny.

And back then, in the good old days,

lesbian meant something

different than it does now.

Back then, lesbian

wasn't about sexuality,

a lesbian was just any

woman not laughing at a man.

"Why aren't you laughing? What are

you? Some kind of lesbian?" Classic.

"Go on. You gotta laugh. Lighten up.

Stop taking everything so seriously!

F***ing learn to take a

joke. You need to lighten up.

I'll tell you what you need to

lighten up. You need a good dicking.

Get a cock up you! Drink

some jizz! You know?"

Actual advice?

It's counterproductive.

I do think I have to quit comedy though.

And seriously. I know it's

probably not the forum...

to make such an announcement, is it?

In the middle of a comedy show.

But I have been questioning...

you know, this whole comedy thing.

I don't feel very

comfortable in it anymore.

You know... over the past year,

I've been questioning

it, and reassessing.

And I think it's healthy for

an adult human to take stock,

pause and reassess.

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