Girlfriends of Christmas Past Page #4

I can smell a liar a mile away.

I know, I smell that way.

I'm a litigator.

Now, was I upset when Anderson

dumped me

ten months after his company

settled a court case

that they outsourced me for?

Yes!

But the only reason he did that

was because he was falling

so deeply for me

and he couldn't handle

those feelings.

Not because he met her.

No offense.

That's what I thought,

but humor me one moment.

When did you and Anderson

break up?

I don't remember.

I paid a therapist good money

to black out that entire year.

Okay, well, the rant you posted

was on December 10th,

three years ago.

Was that the date

that you broke up?

Give or take a few days, yes.

[Livvy] Okay, Zoe.

You posted on December 10th

a year ago.

Do you remember the actual date

that you broke up?

I remember it was

a particularly chilly day...

The date, Zoe! The date!

Sorry! December 2nd.

That was a month after he hired

me for the holiday party,

which means he was seeing me

three weeks

before he dumped you.

That...

unbelievable...

Two-timing, love-drunk swindler!

Don't know how he does it.

I swear.

It was that one-month

anniversary at Belvederes,

I was hook, line, and...

He took you there too?

So what?

So he cheated on me with

a party princess pizza server.

It just is what it is,

and it's done.

Where are you going?

I'm going home, and I'm going

to call my therapist

and ravel up all this crazy that

the two of you just unraveled.

So, thank you very much, ladies.

Merry Christmas!

[Livvy] Wait, Murphy!

Don't you owe it

to this new girl

to show her what a scumbag

Anderson really is?

I don't owe that girl a thing.

Don't you owe it to yourself?

I mean, if you could go back

and see through his tricks,

your favorite flowers delivered

on the first Friday

of every month.

Or the way he would leave

little notes on the refrigerator

feigning excitement

for the wonderful weekend

he has planned for us.

Or how he would wait until the

lights go down in the theater

before offering you

a red licorice

with half of it dangling out of

his mouth about to kiss you!

If you had a chance to see his

wolf eyes under all that fleece,

I mean, wouldn't you take it?

So what do you want us to do?

You want us to go meet this girl

and unravel all of our crazy

onto her?

No. No crazy exes here.

I devised an even better plan

to get even with Mr. Whitmire

this holiday season.

It went off in my head last

night like a bright red bulb.

Oh! Can we call it

"Operation:
Rudolph's Revenge"?

Yay! Okay,

what are we going to do?

[Livvy] We pray on his

weaknesses around her.

We show his true natures' self

without them even knowing

we were there.

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