Futurama: Into the Wild Green Yonder Page #3

Listen, this turquoise-encrusted|bra is worth 50 grand.

Let's sell it and run off|before the Donbot gets wise.

No. It will take a lot more money|than that to make a girl like you happy.

- No, it won't.|- Yeah, it will. Shut up!

We'll run off, but not till after I win|the Universal Poker Championship!

One entry, please.

Bender, no! You can't beat|the best players in the universe.

- You're not lucky enough.|- Oh, no? I'm 40% lucky.

The scrap metal I'm made from|included a truckload of horseshoes

from the luckiest racehorses in Mexico,|who had just been sent to a glue factory.

- They don't sound so lucky to me.|- Not without their shoes.

That's great!

Here, Bendy, take this.|It will give you 70% more luck.

It's the Donbot's lucky robot's foot.

All right!|With two kinds of luck, I can't lose.

No, wait, three.|I stepped on a leprechaun.

Yo, you see this over here over there?

I'm powering up the clamps.

Whoa, whoa, whoa.|Let us not rush to judgment.

But, Skip, that was your lucky robot's|foot what came off of your lucky leg.

While it is true that I did wake up|with only one foot this morning,

there is no proof that my|beloved Fanny was involved.

Aside from the hacksaw|I found under her pillow.

Well, what about that Bender guy?|You want I should give him the clamps?

Not yet, Clamps. Only one thing|can prove that he has my lucky foot.

Torture with the clamps|or a clamp-like device?

No. We are gonna sit tight and see|if he wins the poker tournament.

He does, that proves|he's packing my lucky foot,

in which event...

The clamps!

Or a clamp-like device.

Welcome viewers|who fell asleep with the TV on!

It's the 3009 no-limit|hold 'em championship.

I'm the massive head|of Penn Jillette,

and here with a color|commentary, my partner Teller.

Our act really didn't|change much when he died.

Pardon me,|I'm new to this game.

Is this duffle bag big|enough for all your money?

Bender? Oh, boogers.|We're in the same tournament.

Quick, get your entry fee|back before I bankrupt you.

In your dreams, nutloaf.

Bite my shiny metal hat.

Tex Connecticut,|the pride of Kansas City, first to act.

Smiley Spiff, up next.

Looks like B*obs Vanderbilt|has a decent pair.

Also, she's got two eights.

And Bender Rodriguez picks|up a lucky deal right off the bat.

Two aces.|I'm thinking guitar solo.

I fold.

Holy crap! A stunning play by|mentally ill newcomer Philip Fry.

It's almost as if|he knew Bender had two aces.

Bender has two aces? I'm out.

- I'm out.|- I'm out.

Suck my luck!

See this gun?

That's what I'm gonna|do to Bender if he wins.

All in. Call my mighty bid at your peril.

My cards are awful, and I need a hug.

I call your bluff.

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