Frat Party Page #3

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- Two days.

- Okay.

I will see you

on Saturday morning.

- (groans)

- I'm not supposed to see the bride

- before the wedding, anyways.

- I will take the red-eye.

What? You're going to take

a red-eye to your own wedding?

It's an easy flight. I'll be there

first thing in the morning.

Yeah... hung-over.

Is Kelly going?

- What?

- Kelly.

Kelly, you know?

Kelly... Kelly Kelly...

- whore Kelly... slut Kelly...

- Yeah, I know...

- Remember? Kelly?

- Yeah.

I don't know... I don't know

if she's going to be there.

- I don't know who's going to be there.

- God. Yeah.

- It's a big party.

- Mm-hmm. Duffy,

if you so much as touch her arm,

you're dead meat.

You have nothing

to worry about.

It's not you I'm worried about.

It's your friends

and all of your ex-girlfriends.

Babe, it's just... your father

has a thousand divisions

and they're all in these

little tiny countries.

- (laughs)

- And so, this is the last time

I'm going to be on American soil

for a long time.

Duffy, come on. You know

you need to learn the business.

And Bulgaria?

Oh my God, how much fun.

Whoa... Bulgaria?

- Yeah.

- You didn't tell me Bulgaria!

Bulgaria... like prostitution's

the biggest way

- to make money in Bulgaria.

- (laughs)

That place is scary, babe.

I need... okay.

That... that just proves my point.

I need to be here.

I need to party one last time

in the United States of America...

- Oh yes.

...because I'm a patriot.

- (laughs)

- And I'm gonna marry you

in this great country

on this soil

because I pledge

my allegiance to you...

- (laughs)

...because I love you.

You are f***ing nuts.

Do you know that?

And that might be

one of the reasons why I love you.

Have I ever told you

I dreamt about you

- when I was like 10 years old?

- Mm. No.

You were the same size,

the same age,

- but I was 10 and I remember you.

- (laughs)

- You're a dork.

- I know.

I swear to God,

you call me.

Do you understand?

You call me from the party,

you call me when you get to LAX

and you call me

when you land

in San Francisco, okay?

Do not forget.

You call me, Duffy.

- So, what... what am I doing again?

- Oh, you're calling me.

Oh, call you.

Yeah, I'll call you.

I'll call you

whenever I have service

and I will see you first thing

in the morning

in Napa for our wedding.

Papa's gonna kill you.

Mm.

Babe, we... we talked about it

and he didn't even care.

He just... he was more concerned

about his friends and the family,

everyone going to the wedding.

And I promise you,

when I get to that reception,

I will just lick his a**hole clean...

Eww. And you'd better, okay?

You need to make him love you.

I will.

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