Fierce People Page #4

Nope.

Adolescence is a time of indulgence

for the girls.

What's the chivalrous thing to do

when you make out with a girl...

with her comatose father laying

next to you like a big root vegetable?

I knew I should call her.

But what do I say?

"Hi. I like kissing you.

Thanks for letting me touch

your boob. Can I do it again?"

Finn!

Finn?

Could I have some privacy, please?

I'm trying to make a phone call.

- Okay, I'll tell Maya Langley

to beat it. - What?

Shoot!

Damnit!

Shut up!

- I just Windexed that!

- Yeah, well, too bad.

- Hi.

- Hi.

I got tired of waiting

for you to call me.

I don't know if I should let

my sister see that, Finn.

That's a film my dad made...

- on his first trip to South America.

- Your father's Fox Blanchard?

I read him in my anthro class

at Harvard. Maya...

do you realize this man's father

is the Elvis of anthropology?

- Well, I guess I do now.

- It's movie time.

- What is that?

- A tapir.

It's a small hog pig-like animal.

How are they gonna eat all that?

After a feast, the women

hide the leftovers in their vaginas.

- That's disgusting!

- Fantastic!

God, your dad is so cool.

You look like him.

I was gonna spend the summer

doing field work.

I would kill to be doing that

with your father.

- Why don't you go?

- I got busted.

- What for?

- Coke.

Very cool. I'm impressed, Finn.

My mother thought living in Vlyvalle

would be a wholesome influence for me.

I think the Ishkanani

have it all figured out.

What do you mean?

It's f***, kill.

Unlike us domesticated creatures,

they like something, they f*** it.

If they don't, they kill it.

- Do you always have to say "f***"?

- Virgins fall into two categories.

- Finn, you paying attention?

- Yeah.

They either love the F word

and they don't wanna do it...

or they hate the F word

and they're dying to do it.

- Cut it out!

- Let's watch it backwards.

Stop it!

F***.

Kill.

F***.

Kill.

F***.

Kill.

F***.

Kill.

- Want me to see if I can get you in?

- Maya invited you!

You want me to speak to her?

For me?

Oh, no. That's not likely.

Then I guess I should

throw this away then.

- Are you serious?

- Serious.

- Oh, really!

- Really.

My foot!

So that's Osborne's new super drug.

I wonder if she charges the old goat

by the hour or by the orgasm.

- You know, Mom?

- What?

Since you've gotten sober,

you've gotten much better looking.

- It's hardly the time to put me down.

- No, I'm serious! Really!

- Okay. Thank you.

- You're welcome.

- I've gotta have a drink.

- No, you don't have to have...

- Just a little get-through. Relax.

- You don't have...

- Just to calm my nerves.

- Liz!

- Liz...

- Hi!

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