Fart: A Documentary

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( farting )

Uh, Dad say,

"No more farts! "

When she farts,

it's always funny

Even if it smells

When I fart,

it's only sometimes funny

Depending on

a lot of factors

But when the dog farts,

it can be hilarious

To downright

goddamn dangerous

That air is toxic

Better hold your breath

Dog farts

How unfortunate, oh

Dog farts

Someone open a window

Dog farts

I think

he woke himself up

With that one

I thought, at last!

Somebody's making a film

about farting.

That's been

a long time coming.

I have to say at first when you

said that you were gonna do

a documentary on farting,

and I thought,

- Oh, my. Yeah.

- Who's gonna want

to watch that?

The first thing I said was,

"How can I be a part of this?"

Dog farts

How can a creature

so little

- Dog farts

- Make a smell so huge?

Because it's-- it's

a very interesting subject

and-- and underexplored,

and it's worthy

of closer attention.

- ( farting )

- ( audience laughs )

I'm now going to warm up--

warm up my sphincter myself

with a bit

of classical music.

( audience laughs )

Man:

My name is--

Do you want

my real name, or both names?

Real name

is Paul Oldfield.

But my alter ego,

because like any superhero

I need an alter ego

when I perform

my superhuman abilities.

- ( farting )

- Man:
Oh!

So I metamorphasize

into Mr. Methane.

Male interviewer:

How-- how do you--

how do you prepare yourself

before you perform?

Um, I've been upstairs

in the dressing room

doing lots of stretches

and warm-ups.

- Okay.

- So, I've been tensing

using abdominals

so we're now fully relaxed.

- Okay, I see.

- So, uh...

They say in Spain and Brazil,

Seor Matano.

Okay, so, uh--

uh, what kind of activity

are we gonna see first?

First of all,

I've got a little bit

of fine talcum powder

and I'm going to sprinkle

a little bit on my bottom

so people can actually see

that I am breaking wind.

- Okay, so it's not a fake.

- That's exactly--

Because obviously people

sat at home...

- Uh...

- ( audience laughing )

- These...

- Yeah.

These-- these--

these people over here,

they've got what we call

"ringside seats."

- Yeah.

- ( laughing )

Okay.

Okay.

A little bit of talcum

on the bottom.

There we go.

- Like that.

- Okay.

Is it--

I haven't got a

rearview mirror.

- Is the, um...

- It looks very nice.

Is it well-covered?

- Okay.

- Yes, it's fantastic.

- Here we go.

- Thank you.

In Australia,

I-- down under,

I hold the record

for the most amount

of complaints

to a television show.

From five...

Five,

All:

Four, three, two, one.

( audience guffaws )

All right!

Very good.

Can you guess

where this comes from?

( farting )

Mr. Methane.com

Obviously,

there is a Mr. Methane

website out there.

'Cause, if you're not

on the web now,

well, that's it.

- You're not in business.

- ( farting )

So, you know,

I've got a website,

Mr. Methane.com

Mr. Methane.com

( farting )

Male announcer:

The world's windiest website.

( farting )

Man:

Lovely. Lovely.

My background

field is actually

American literature.

But I developed

an interest in American humor.

I run the creative writing

program here.

And I teach a module

on how to write humor.

Farting,

I happen to know,

features throughout

the history of humor.

I mean, I did a project

a few years back where

I went in search

of the oldest joke

in the world.

Um, we-- well,

you can't actually find the

oldest joke in the world

but the oldest joke

that I could find--

the oldest recorded joke,

in other words,

the oldest one-liner,

if you like,

is actually a fart joke.

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