Extract Page #3

Thank you so much.

You do your thing.

Joel? One more thing.

Hey, Joel?

- Hon.

- Hi.

Man, that Nathan won't shut up.

Oh, I know. What an a**hole.

That wife of his is even worse.

I mean, I wonder how long he would

talk if you just let him go, you know?

I'm actually afraid

to go into our own front yard sometimes

because I'm afraid

he's going to be milling around.

Remember when we had our condo?

We could just go

straight from the garage inside.

No one would bother us.

We could walk to 7-Eleven.

(CELL PHONE BUZZING)

We didn't have to worry

about plumbers or pool cleaners.

Speaking of that,

we've got to hire a new pool cleaner.

He never checks the chlorine levels.

Sorry, it's just this new synthetic vanilla

has a much higher triple point

than we thought,

which means that

the new cookies-and-cream extract

that we've been working on

could really work,

and I just... I gotta get to this

before Weber Flavors beats us to it,

'cause if something like this caught on,

it could be big.

Could sell the company.

Do you remember

that logo that you designed

for the original

cookies-and-cream extract?

I still have that framed in my office.

Do you remember it?

Yeah. And now I design coupons.

Do you want to go to the bedroom?

- Oh, I'm a little tired.

- Really?

Yeah, just... I don't know.

It's the middle of the week.

It's not the middle of the week.

It's Monday, baby.

It's Monday? Sh*t!

- What happened?

- Dancing with the Stars.

(DANCING WITH THE STARS THEME

PLAYING ON TV)

Oh? Is it on?

(SIGHS)

I gotta get a house

that's got a bathroom

that doesn't share a wall with the TV.

Why would you do that?

Because it is a little tough to jerk it

with the TV blaring at you

through the wall, Dean.

Well, why don't you use

one of the other two bathrooms?

It'd be too suspicious.

We don't use those bathrooms.

I'll just...

I'll put some insulation in or something.

Insulation?

You do not need

to put fiberglass in your walls

because you have so much

masturbation shame.

You need to take responsibility

for yourself and snap one off

wherever you want to

in your own home.

You own your house.

You own your own business.

I mean,

you used to be a bartender here.

Now look at what you have.

I know, but come on. What...

What, really, do I have?

Okay? It's a pain in the ass.

I work all the time.

What does it get me?

Nobody cares about extracts,

certainly not my wife.

The stock guy with the shitty band

probably gets laid more often than I do.

Yeah, but he probably lives

in a really crappy apartment.

I would very gladly move

into a crappy apartment

if the bathroom

wasn't right next to the TV.

CINDY:
It belonged to my father.

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