Ernest Saves Christmas Page #3

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- You forgot something. | - Take it easy, mister.

It's not me. | It's my brother.

He does this all the time.

We go out. He says he has the money, | and then we eat.

Then he goes to the bathroom | and sneaks out.

When the check comes, | I'm left with no money...

and this stupid look on my face.

Please, mister, | just let me go this time.

You expect me to believe that?

I swear it's true. | Look!

There's my brother now. | There he is!

Hey, Tommy!

Hey!

[ Ding, Ding ]

Whoa!

Aaah!

[ Brakes Screech ]

Please, mister, go, go, go!

Aaah!

[ Ding, Ding ]

Ding!

That was my mean uncle.

He makes me work in that restaurant | like a slave.

He keeps me locked up | in the basement...

with rats and filth, | and I just escaped.

Please don't let him get me, okay?

[ As John Wayne ] | Well, not to worry, little lady.

You're safe with us.

Thanks.

I'm Harmony Starr.

Remember that name, | because I'll be famous someday.

This is Ernest, | and I'm Santa Claus.

Surprised?

No, no.

Not really.

[ Children's Voices ]

[ Click ]

That'll be $3 2.50.

There you go.

- Hey, this ain't real. | - What?

This bill carries the likeness of one...

''Mr. Funtime.''

Hmmm.

Really, I don't have much use | for currency,

but I do like to | have a little around.

Just, you know, in case.

Oh, my. | Oh, my goodness.

Last year,

a 5-year-old wanted...

a ''Mr. Funtime'' Grocery Store.

I included a large amount of...

play money.

I suppose I must have | mixed it up.

Dum-da-dum-dum.

What we've got here...

is a failure to ''accumulate.''

[ Sigh ]

What the heck. | It's on the house.

- Merry Christmas, old buddy. | - Thank you, too, old buddy!

[ Indistinct Conversation ]

Oh, right through there, dear.

Ahem. | Excuse me.

I'm looking for a man | named Joseph Carruthers.

I'm the greatest.

Roar.

Me too, me too!

Roar!

For millions of years,

dinosaurs ruled the Earth.

- Roar. | - Roar.

Hey, don't do that!

Then, something | really strange happened.

Uh-oh, it's the ice age!

Oh, no, I don't feel too good.

Ah-ah-ah-choo!

He's a wonderful man.

We're so lucky | to have him with us.

You don't need to tell me. | I've watched him for years.

Yes, well, he's been | such a help here,

and the children | just love him.

I hope he gets something | going for himself soon.

Oh, I imagine he'll have | his hands full very shortly.

That's why we don't see dinosaurs | around anymore.

Hey, listen.

I want to thank all you kids | for coming to see me today.

Why do I say ''thank you''?

Because they never seem old,

they always seem new,

those 3 little words,

''please'' and ''thank you.''

"Jingle bells, checkbook swells "

" Big deals on the way ""

Hey, babe, park it in the shade. | What do you say? All right.

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