El Gringo

---

to be many things.

A doctor...

...astronaut...

...a diver.

To start a band,

be a hugely successful

Latin music star...

Create a blog...

that I'd sell a year later

for a million dollars.

To adopt a stray dog,

paint a picture, learn Spanish...

Yo no hablo espanhol

pero me encanta Rio.

To invest in the stock market...

Start a campaign

against land mines...

and cluster bombs.

Write a book...

A book?

No. A movie script?

Start a revolution, be a Che!

Or maybe not...

while in doubt,

I enjoy my favorite pastimes...

...pornography...

...and video games.

Or, if you prefer,

videogames and pornography.

KICKING ASS IN MIAMI BEACH"

I have just come back

from a short time abroad.

I spent two years there.

It was fun.

But it was time to come back.

And now that I'm back...

I've just found a purpose...

...a path...

...mission to accomplish.

It's Edgar.

Hey, What's up?

A long time ago,

in a galaxy far away...

...I had a bright future.

I always had a connection

to electronic stuff.

It started with remote controls...

Atari, Odyssey, Master System,

then MSX, 286, 386.

I was the family genius,

a big nerd.

When I was in college...

while my friends were drowning

in booze and women...

I practiced things

that were absolutely useless.

Then, my first job.

Say... What are you doing

this weekend?

Well...

...let's just say that.

I felt a certain incompatibility

with the corporate world.

Good morning.

So, is everything ready?

Wait a minute.

F*** me!!!

You call this sh*t a layout?

And a certain difficulty

to cope with critics.

My boss.

"Me."

People called him the bomb-man!

He is an evil visionary!

He asked me to tie him up

and slap him also...

I like his insanity a little bit.

A**hole!

Douche!

He's an antichrist!

Liar!

A loser, loser. Totally a loser!

They even said he was a f*ggot,

I don't know.

I'm out of it...

A guy like that has

no plan for his life?

I do have a plan.

A f***ed up plan, to be honest,

but it is a plan.

- What's up?

- How are you, kid? You're back?

Yeah, I guess.

So, Ching-Ling brought my stuff?

Let's go there.

Ching, you've got a customer.

How are you?

Your toy!

Open it.

I'm curious to see.

Look at this beauty.

I'll tell you.

- Hold this.

- Okay.

Now, walk that way.

Go ahead.

Right there, it's ok!

Now, come slowly...

What is this, man?

This one...

...when it gets near to this one...

It discharges an electric current,

a proximity sensor.

And what are you doing with it?

What I'm gonna do?

My idea is quite simple:

justice.

To kill two rabbits

with just one blow.

TWO RABBITS"

This plan has been dancing

in my mind for quite a while-.

It was before I went to Miami.

But I perfected it there.

I just need some sort of a click,

to find that last piece of the

puzzle and see the whole picture.

Hey, you! Punk!

You moron!

Retarded!

Nice to meet you.

My name is Edgar.

Wake up, man! Give me your watch.

Hurry up, you ass!

You wanna die? Wanna be shot at?

In the head? That's it.

Where's the money? I said money!

You call this money?

Give me your money, come one!

What is that thing over there?

- My cell phone.

- Give me that.

- What else do you have? What else?

- Nothing.

Nothing?

Have a nice day, pal.

Sh*t! I was mugged!

What if he'd get a shot off?

It could've been fun.

What could I have done

for him to shoot me?

What if I did this?

Or this?

Oh! FON FON, the teddy bear.

You f***ing vagabonds!

Hey, DArtagnan. Wake up.

Come eat something.

Man, drop that f***ing

magazine and come eat something.

I'm coming, bro.

- Come on!

- Just a second, man.

- Mrs. Te. I'm here.

- Come on in.

I've brought food for the guys.

It's all there.

At least the food, I'm starving.

You don't work

And you wanna eat?

Maicon called.

He said it's all good.

Business is up.

- So?

- Uncle Maicon's words: close shop.

- Close shop?

- God knows what he means.

This is Bola, aka Carioca.

He's Maicon's right hand man.

Who's Maicon?

I'll tell you later.

The right question now is:

what are these guys doing...

looking at the Persian carpet

in their living room?

Take the carpet up.

Come on, hurry.

Take her, guys.

This is Miss Puhn.

P + U + H + N

But, why is Miss Puhn buried

alive in this fethid hole?

It was because of her mother

Mrs. Clia, or Mrs. Puhn.

P + U + H + N

Bling, Bling! Bling, bling!

The Geush Brothers!

Mrs. Celia is a trusted employee

of the Geush Twins...

who got rich with a cheap

TV auction show.

Mrs. Celia is particularly

close to Sasha...

The oldest

and the gayest of them.

So, it happens that Sasha

besides trusting Miss. Celia

her love affair secrets,

trusted also

the company's vault secret.

And it was exactly that secret that ended

up placing Miss. Celia and her daughter

in that, let's say,

difficult situation.

Now you have your money,

where's my daughter?

Where's my daughter?

Easy, easy!

Gimme the glasses!

F***ing coward.

You've sh*t your pants.

F***!

Answer the f***ing door!

Everybody quiet!

Hands on your heads, come on!

Easy, man!

There's a child here.

Shut the f*** up!

What's this?

Where's Maicon in all this sh*t?

Wait, wait, it's not the time to reveal

who Maicon is.

Later...

DISTRICT ATTORNEY'S OFFICE

I need 144, please.

I think it's December

if I'm not mistaken.

Thank you.

Julia?

- How are you?

- Hi, Rodrigues.

- I'm fine. You?

Rate this script:0.0 / 0 votes