Educating Rita Page #3

- Lovely.

- Good.

- Brian.

- Darling.

It's Frank.

Yes, yes, I know that, Morgan.

I don't think you've even

read the contract.

Morgan, you don't seem to be

listening to me.

You realise that I'll probably

have to go to Jones.

- Hello, darling.

- Hello.

- Hello, Elaine.

- Hello, Frank.

- You didn't go to the pub then?

- I changed my mind.

Good. I'll see to the dinner.

But Morgan, you don't seem

to understand how important this is.

It is imperative that the book is

published before the next academic year.

Yes, yes, yes, all right.

I'll phone tomorrow. Goodbye.

Sorry about that - my publisher.

Frank, I wanted to mention this

before we dine.

Slightly embarrassing.

Thing is, there's been

a bit of a complaint.

A complaint, Brian?

Yes, well, apparently, you were

a little drunk at your tutorial today.

- No.

- No?

- No, I was a lot drunk.

- Frank, why do you do it?

When you've got...

Well, what haven't you got?

- A drink, at the moment.

- Oh, Frank.

The staff accept that you...

Well, we understand that you drink

but it shouldn't be

displayed to the students.

Do you know what assonance means?

- Of course.

- Yeah? Go on.

- Assonance.

- Yeah.

Assonance is a rhyme,

the identity of which depends

merely on the vowel sounds.

An assonance is merely

a... syllabic resemblance.

Assonance means

getting the rhyme wrong.

I want to look like that.

- OK.

- Is that a book you're reading?

- Yeah, yeah.

- What's it called?

- Of Human Bondage.

- Yeah?

My husband's got a lot of books like that.

What, Somerset Maugham books?

No, bondage books.

Oh.

Oh, hello. I was just oiling it for ya.

Ooh, sorry, Frank.

- You can have that.

- Sit down.

I love walking round this room.

Rita, don't you ever just

come into a room and sit down?

I don't want to sit down.

I love that lawn down there.

All the proper students.

What?

Oh, yes, yes.

Now, er, this essay you wrote for me.

It was crap.

No, no. The thing is, Rita,

how the hell can you write an essay

on EM Forster

with almost total reference

to Harold Robbins?

Oh, well... Well, you said

to bring in other authors.

"Reference to other works

will impress the examiners," you said.

Yes, I said refer to other works but

I doubt if the examiner will have read...

- Where Love Has Gone.

- That's his hard luck.

And it'll be your hard luck

when he fails your paper

because he would

if you wrote like this during an exam.

Oh, that's prime. Now, there's justice.

I fail cos I'm more well-read

than the friggin' examiner.

Devouring pulp fiction

is not being well-read.

I thought reading

was supposed to be good for one.

It is but you have to be selective.

In your favour here

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