Dungeons & Dragons Page #4

or you will suffer

a fate far worse...

than that which hath

been inflicted upon me.

So there I am, hogtied,

lying on my back.

This Orc starts poking me

with the spear.

Kind of a no-win situation.

So, I say to myself,

"What do I got to lose?"

So, I take that spear

and bite it.

And I start chewing.

Idol of idols.

With an Elf.

You got to be kidding.

The problem with Elves is

they got no meat on their bones.

You got to get yourself

a nice 250-pound Dwarf.

With hair on her chin

you can hang on to.

Excuse me, little man.

You looking for somebody

in particular?

Or are you just looking for...

somebody?

Actually...

I'm looking for someone

just like you.

What a coincidence...

'cause I was looking for someone

just like you.

We got to celebrate.

Bartender, give me a bottle

of your best wine.

Make that your cheapest.

Wait.

I need the girl.

Bar fight!

Get them !

This ain't the time for romance!

-What are you doing?

-Come on! Come on!

Wait, I got to go back.

I think I'm in love!

With an Elf?

They think Humans are a joke!

All right, I lied.

I just want to hit it!

Let's get Ridley out of here.

Bidet, bidet, bidet.

That Wraith

must have been defective.

-He seemed reliable to me.

-He did not.

It's Damodar, man.

He's onto us.

With what we've walked into,

everyone's going to be onto us.

What do you mean,

everybody's onto us?

Go ahead.

Tell him what you got us into.

Me? But you--

Go ahead.

Tell me what you got us into.

According to the Wraith

inside the scroll...

the Rod we're looking for

caused the Great War.

Is that all?

Have you lost your damn mind?

What does this Rod do?

It's supposed to have the power

to control Red Dragons.

I don't know about you...

but this sound

like a pretty bad idea to me.

It gets better.

This map

leads to a Dragon temple.

To get in, we have to get

the Eye of the Dragon...

from the Guildmaster

of the Thieves Guild...

in Antius City.

Xilus?

No. Get--

No way!

I told her she's crazy...

but she keeps going on about

Profion and the Empress.

Profion?

They can

take care of themselves.

I suggest we lay low...

Iet the whole thing blow over,

come back, rob everybody.

That's all. Let's go.

Snails,

there's one more small problem.

Problem?

What's the problem, Ridley?

I kind of committed us

to find it.

Ridley, how could you

do something like that?

You--

I can't believe this.

I can't believe--

"This is our big chance", huh?

"Let's rob the magic school.

This is our big chance!"

That's what you said to me,

right?

This is...

dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb.

Dumb!

I got a new name for dumb.

"Ridley".

This is the Ridley-est thing

I ever heard of.

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