Dorm Daze 2 Page #2

I'll take anything with a vagina.

Last night, I tried to f*** a porthole.

Rusty.

I saw your name on the sign-up sheet.

That's great you support abstinence.

I didn't know you were a virgin.

Ahh! Keep it on the D.L., will ya?

- OK.

- You're right.

It's truly the one thing I keep sacred.

Rusty, you're a virgin?

Wow. What a shock.

You know, there is a difference...

between saving yourself for marriage...

and just being too lame to score.

I think the meeting is gonna be fun.

Abstinence Is Awesome.

Tweedleslut and Tweedledum,

you two ain't virgins.

If I didn't have a D.U.I. already...

I'd drive a bus through your v-jays.

Getting arrested last year...

was the best thing

that ever happened to us.

Yeah, the best.

It was in our court-mandated drug rehab...

that Lynne and I realized

we needed to change.

We've become born-again virgins.

We know you're not for abstinence, Rusty.

We're watching you.

Yeah, mister.

Eyes wide shut. Humph.

Why are you going

to Violet's support group?

Isn't that kind of, you know,

counterproductive to getting laid?

Are you kidding?

These girls are about

to snap at any second...

and I wanna make sure I'm around

when it happens.

God! Why is she hanging out with Stukas?

He's such an a**hole.

What do you care? You dumped her.

I know. I can't stop thinking about her.

Ohh! You still like her!

No, I don't. Shut up.

Yeah, you do! You love her!

Ow! He loves you, Rachel!

- Ow!

- Dude, shut...

Ow!

Thank you for coming

to Abstinence Is Awesome.

- Whoo!

- Whoo-hoo!

Whoo, yeah!

Ah, wonderful!

Just great! Yeah!

Yes!

There's a lot of pressure

for us women to give it up.

You have movies, magazines, television...

music videos, the internet.

People are having cybersex.

I mean, we can't give in to temptation.

We have to stay strong.

- Yes!

- Whoo!

Yes!

Whoo!

Marla, Lynne, would you like to share?

- Yes.

- Thank you, ladies.

As you know, recently Lynne and I

became born-again virgins.

Hallelujah. Yes!

But it wasn't always easy.

I mean, there were times that we...

we gave in to temptation.

Yeah.

A lot.

It's so easy to lose control.

Yeah, like when you plan on

only giving a guy a blow job...

and it's just so much fun

that you end up sleeping with him.

We have to resist these male advances.

That's why from here on out...

I am carrying a rape horn.

Me, too!

OK. Thank you, ladies.

Now for a male perspective.

Rusty, why did you decide

to save yourself for marriage?

Well, Violet, I just want...

my first time...

to be, uh...

really, really special.

You know, like, uh...

on a cruise ship.

With, uh, the tropical breeze...

in cabin one hundred twenty-six...

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