Detention of the Dead Page #3
Not a single student in this school
would be caught dead there.
Don't you mean caught...
Undead there?
What do we do about that, brainiac?
From the little observations
that I've been able to make,
- zombies seem to be uni-attentional.
- Ok. What?
Zombies only pay attention to
what's right in front of them.
So, so if we don't draw
their attention...
We should just be able
to walk right by.
You go first.
Way to go, Edster!
This way!
Downstairs. Go! Go!
Hey! Hey! Come here!
Come and get me! Come and get me!
Hey! Go, go, go!
Come and get me!
Come and get me.
Come here.
- In the library!
- Get the door! Get the door!
Go! Go!
Yeah!
Aha!
Yeah! Hell, yeah!
Jesus, Eddie.
I know, I didn't think
Ok, she's not looking too good.
I can't believe this is happening.
I am student council
vice president.
Junior prom queen, and
head cheerleader,
and I have a serious problem
with the direction
this school is taking.
Well, I'd adjust
quickly if I were you,
or the next popularity
contest you'll be winning
is most likely to get eaten
by the student body.
Aah! Oh!
Again?
Damn it, Janet. Help me.
What should I do?
Here. Hold her neck.
Keep pressure on it.
Eddie's been studying medical
school since like infancy,
so maybe he knows.
Ew!
Hey, what is it?
Oh, nothing big.
Just the end of the world.
Ah! Ah!
Mrs. Rumblethorp?
Oh, please don't be dead.
Please?
Ok...
Ok... Ok.
Come on. Janet!
Bradikins. You saved me.
Guys, help me!
Whoa.
Aah!
Did she bite you?
No! I bent my finger weird.
I can't hold her much longer.
- Her brain. Her brain!
- What?
Eddie's right, the only
way to kill a zombie
is destroy its brain.
That cuntress has been riding
me since I was a freshman.
It's time for some payback.
Bring her to me.
How you like me now,
Rumbly Thumbly? Hmm?
It looks like rob zombie
raped the entire
cast of gossip girl
and this is their angry love child.
And who knows what it's
like everywhere else.
Tried the land lines. Nothing.
So we're completely cutoff
from the rest of the world?
What about the Internet?
None of our phones
can get a signal.
School computer?
Really?
That thing's so ancient
it makes old tron
look cutting edge.
It's worth a try, ok?
You know, maybe we
can email for help.
Or tweet. OMG, zombies
attacking the school.
Send help pronto.
Here goes nothing.
This might take awhile.
Well, if this isn't a commentary
on the current state
of public education,
I don't know what is.
Yeah, that helps.
Feet in the air and
head on the ground
You try this trick and spin it
Your head will collapse
but there's nothing in it
So you ask yourself
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"Detention of the Dead" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 5 May 2024. <https://www.scripts.com/script/detention_of_the_dead_6799>.
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