Desk Set Page #8

nine letters in "Chappaqua"?

Are you in the habit of

associating words...

with the number of letters in them?

I associate many things

with many things.

I see. Hmm.

Aren't you going to ask me how many

people got off at White Plains? Three.

But there are ten letters

in White Plains.

No. Eleven.

But only three got off there.

You see, I've only ever

been to White Plains...

three times in my whole life.

Well, supposing you'd

only been there twice.

But I wasn't.

I was there three times.

Aren't you gonna ask me

how many people got on at Croton Falls?

There is no Croton Falls

mentioned at all in the question.

No, but it is

the next-to-the-last stop on that line.

Anyway, one.

- Aren't you cold?

- No, no, don't worry. I never get cold.

Now, do you notice anything unusual

about the following sentence?

"Able was I, ere I saw Elba."

Um, no.

But...

I doubt that Napoleon

ever said anything like that.

Unless you mean because it's spelled

the same way backward and forward.

Is that what you meant?

What do they call it? A...

A palindrome.

Mmm. I know another.

"Madam, I'm Adam."

I doubt if he ever said that.

Now, I have

three telephone numbers.

I'm going to repeat them just once.

- See if you can repeat them after me.

- Mm-hmm.

- Are you ready?

- Yeah.

Plaza 2-3391.

Hmm.

Murray Hill 3-1099.

Plaza 2-3931.

Tough question?

Mm-mmm.

Tough roast beef.

Plaza 2-3391.

Murray Hill 3-1099.

And Plaza 2-3931.

Would you mind

telling me how you arrived at that?

First is Plaza 2 with

the year of the bank panic reversed.

The second one is Murray Hill 3...

with, uh, 33 years after

the date of the Norman conquest.

And the last one is Plaza 2...

with the number

the same as the first,

second and third digits transposed.

Except that there's something

terribly wrong with that question.

Mmm, really?

I don't think there is

any Plaza 2 exchange.

Mm-hmm.

"What, if anything,

is, uh, wron..."

- Well, I guess we can skip that.

- Mmm.

Whew.

Now, before asking you

the next question,

I must advise you

it contains a trick.

In order to see into the trick,

I give you two words of advice:

Never assume.

Don't worry. I won't.

- Are you ready?

- Mm-hmm.

"A detective

broke into an apartment,

"found Harry and Grace

lying on the floor, dead.

Mm-hmm.

"Beside them was

a small pool of water...

"and some fragments

of broken glass.

"Above them, on a sofa

looking down at them, was a pet cat,

"his back arched.

"The detective concluded,

without further investigation,

"that the victims had died

of strangulation.

How was this conclusion possible?"

Never assume, hmm?

Never assume.

Yeah, well,

Rate this script:5.0 / 1 vote