Dancing Lady

Thirty beautiful girls,

the pick of New York City.

Guaranteed to send a shiver

up and down the spine...

of each and every boy from 18 to 80.

The gallant extravaganza...

- I don't like the looks of this place, Tod.

- Come on, you'll get a lot of laughs.

Step right up, folks. Step right up.

Step right up.

Thirty beautiful girls,

the pick of New York.

- Where do they pick them from?

- Right off the streets.

Come, come.

You're talking of the ladies I love.

Hey, mister,

can you spare a quarter today?

- Come on, I'll buy you a ticket. One more.

- Thanks.

I ain't had no entertainment for weeks.

There you are, Mr. Farnsworth,

there you are.

- Has the striptease begun yet?

- No, not yet.

- Tod, what is a striptease?

- Oh, it's some more of that...

What?

Hey, young fella

Best to close your old umbrella

Have a glorious day

Throwing rubbers away

'Cause it ain't gonna rain no more

Hey, young fella

Put your raincoat in the cellar

While you're tying your tie

Take a peek at that sky

'Cause it ain't gonna rain no more

Look at that brave little rainbow

Fighting those clouds up above

I'm in the ring, Mr. Rainbow

With a horseshoe in my glove

Hey, young fella

Throw away your old umbrella

Give your trousers a hitch

'Cause we're gonna be rich

'Cause it ain't gonna rain no more

Hey, pipe the carriage trade.

Give him love

With a kiss

Hold him close to you

With love's caress

Lead him on to happiness

With a sigh

And the thrill

Close your drowsy eyes

Drift to paradise

Give him love

And you'll hold your man

Say, Janie...

get a load of Park Avenue, will you?

Yeah, doing the slums in ermine.

I'll pull it for you, baby.

Encore, encore!

Wait a minute, beautiful.

Come on over to the station house,

the Lieutenant is throwing a party.

- Can't I even get some clothes?

- No, he wants you just as you are.

Oh, it's that kind of a party.

- Yes, it's that kind of a party. Come on.

- Well, wait a minute. Don't get to...

All of you, sit down.

Hey, what's the big idea?

All right then! He should come.

Oh, goody, we're going on a buggy ride.

I won't even have to walk home.

All right, let's go.

Get in, Mr. Farnsworth. Get in.

Thank you so much for the lovely party.

- Where do we go from here?

- Night court.

Night court? Excuse me, I'll walk.

Order in the court!

You are charged

with giving an indecent performance...

at the International Burlesque house.

- Who's the arresting officer?

- I am, sir.

What did you see?

- Well, they were doing an indecent dance.

- What kind of a dance?

Well, it was something like this,

Your Honor.

These girls were doing a striptease.

A striptease. I see.

What is your name?

Rosette Henrietta LaRue.

Occupation:
Hip swinging.

Now, Miss LaRue,

just what constitutes a striptease?

A good constitution

and a couple of zippers.

- Don't be ambiguous.

- I won't if you won't!

Sergeant...

to what extent of exposure

does the striptease go?

Hey, don't ask him, ask me.

I'll be delighted to show you.

- No, you won't!

- What's the matter? Why can't I show...

Order!

Next defendant.

The judge could give you 15 years

for what you're thinking.

It'd be worth it.

- Name?

- Janie Barlow.

- Occupation?

- Social worker.

Why were you doing a striptease?

If you'd walked the streets

looking for a job...

and hadn't eaten for a week,

you'd do a striptease, too.

Do you mean to tell me

that in a city like this...

burlesque dancing

was the only work you could find?

It was the only dancing I could find.

- Did it have to be dancing?

- Yeah, it had to be dancing.

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