Da Sweet Blood of Jesus Page #4

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I had the strangest thing

happen to me this morning.

Nah, this afternoon.

"Anyhoo,"

it really had me trippin'.

Sit down.

Please?

May I have a "Kalula"?

Black Russian, please.

Yes, you may.

Miss?

What can I get for you?

A Kahlua Black Russian

for the lady.

Do you have Absolut Citron?

Yes, we do.

- Neat, please.

- Coming right up.

Be right back.

Here you go.

- Thank you.

- Thank you.

Now, where were we?

- I'm Lucky Mays.

- Dick.

You have a last name,

Mr. Dick?

- Yes.

- And?

Long.

Mr. Dick Long.

- At your service.

- Are you serious?

As cancer.

Lucky, why don't you

finish your Black Russian,

and let's get out of here?

How long is long?

Champagne for my real friends,

real pain for my sham friends.

Cheers.

Ah. And then?

Looking at my coochie,

it's about that time

So much to do,

so much on my mind...

- So, are we gonna f***?

- Mr. Dick Long,

ain't you one vulgar dude?

Sorry if I offended you

for being so blunt.

I'm not offended,

but I have never

"likened" that word.

Lucky Mays, you are one fine...

- super sexy lady.

- Boo,

thanks for the compliment.

But I still don't like

that vulgar word, "f***."

Help me out

with this dress, please.

Lookin' at my coochie,

it's about that time

Lookin' at my coochie

It's about that time...

Why don't you go ahead

and relax yourself?

...'Cause I will get mine

Looking at my coochie,

it's about that time

So you best get yours

'cause I will get mine...

You got any money?

Now look who's being vulgar?

Money ain't vulgar.

Martha's Vineyard ain't cheap,

and neither is this good p*ssy.

No licky, no sticky,

no ticky, no tacky.

How much you need?

I need 500 to start with.

Now?

Yep.

You're so predictable,

she says, "I miss you, too"

Baby, come over,

she says, "Not tonight"

"Why's that?" "Last night,

me and John had a fight"

Looking at my coochie,

it's about that time

- Looking at my coochie...

- Slow down.

I'm not goin' anywhere.

Ow! Stop,

YOU play too rough!

Ow!

Stop!

Ow! Ahh!

Looking at my coochie,

it's about that time

Best to get yours

'cause I will get mine

Now I'm an independent woman

who ain't trying to wait

Call up the one motherf***er...

The only problem is

that he has no soul

And depending on the weather,

it can be so cold

But that don't bother me

'cause he's long and strong

Moves like a cat

and stays where he belongs

I keep him in a box

right beside my bed...

Aah!

...he won't ask for head

Shakes like I tell him

Till it time to breathe

In the box,

when I'm finished

I get dressed and leave

Looking at my coochie,

it's about that time

Best to get yours

'cause I will get mine

Looking at my coochie,

it's about that time

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