Clear History

Synopsis: A PR specialist refuses to market a car called a "Howard" - a colossal error that loses him a billion dollars and makes him a national joke. He loses his hair, shaves his beard, takes a new name, and moves to Martha's Vineyard. Jump ten years: "Rolly" is a popular local whose sangfroid evaporates when the Howard's inventor moves to the island. Rolly, his old self unrecognizable, hatches a plan to rid the island of his nemesis; he also decides to woo the billionaire's wife. Fellatio, a former girlfriend, a woman who's lost weight, her boyfriend, the band Chicago, a menacing Chechen, a bus load of ill children, and a pair of ne'er-do-wells with experience with explosives figure in the story.
Genre: Comedy
Director(s): Greg Mottola
Production: HBO Films
Rotten Tomatoes:
101 min


(25 OR 6 TO 4.

Oh. F***.

Sir, you were driving

erratically back there.

I'm gonna be honest with you, okay.

I kind of got swept up in the music and...

You know, I got swept up.

I was swept. I got swept up.

Sir, step out of the car.

Have you ever performed

a field sobriety test?


- Just put one foot in front of the other.

- Yeah.

Heel-to-toe, for nine steps.

One foot and extend your arms to the side.

Can you do that?

I'm sober! I can't do it!

No shaking.

Look, this is not easy.

You can do it 'cause you've practiced.

- Come with me.

- What?

Sir, you are clearly intoxicated.

I'm not! I wasn't drinking.

I was just happy.

Is that the penalty for being happy?

The head, the head, the precious head.

Don't hurt the head.

- Hey, Nathan.

- Hey, Ben.

How are you, man?

What a f***ed up morning I had.

- Today? This morning?

- Yeah, this morning.


Hey, did you hear

Haney's gonna use one of my ideas

in the big presentation today.

- Is that right'?

- Yeah, how about that, huh?

- Congratulations.

- Thank you very much.

Your mother must be so proud of you.

- Well...

- "Ben got something in the presentation."

- "We're so proud of him."

- It's... Yeah.

- "Did you hear?"

- I hope Haney likes it.

Did you see? His son is

in the office today.

- Is that right?

- Yeah, Howard.

He named his son after Howard Roark

from Ayn Rand's The Fountainhead.

- Howard Roark.

- I never read it.

As far as I'm concerned,

he's probably the biggest a**hole

in the history of literature,

and then you name your kid...

- Why would you do that?

- Oh, Jesus.

- Are you all right down there?

- This just drives me crazy.


I'm sick of these outlets

always on the floor.

Every time I try and plug something in,

I have to move furniture,

and I strain my back.

Why can't outlets be up here?

- At eye level.

- Eye level?

What are they, like genitals?

We have to hide them?

Why are we hiding outlets?

- Think about it.

- Yeah. It's a...

- See you later.

- Okay.

Good to see you, boss. Good luck today.

Hey. Ben, how are you? Where you been?

I had a little problem

this morning.

- It's... Crazy.

- Big day today.

Sorry. Sorry I'm late.


Is that new?

No. I've had it for a while.

That's a Plepler, he paints shopping carts.

As a kid, I was fascinated

by shopping carts

because you get to drive them

in the supermarket.

It's quite beautiful. I can't believe

I never noticed that before.

Something about the shopping cart

I find mesmerizing.

Hey, look who's here!

Hi, buddy. How ya doing?

How are you doing?

You wanna meet Mr. Flomm?

- Hello. Hi.

- Hi.

Nathan, this is my son, Howard.

- Hello.

- This is our nanny, Marina.

- Marina, this is Nathan Flomm.

- Marina?

- Nice to meet you.

- Hi, nice to meet you.

I like that, that swirl

you got on your hair there.

Thank you. It takes a few hours.

- Huh? It takes a few hours.

- It takes a few hours.

What do you do about the shampooing?

Once a week.

- You shampoo once a week.

- Once a week when I do it.

You may wanna consider

going twice, you know.

That's a long time to

go without shampooing.

But this takes two hours.

Try a second shampoo.

Take a little tip, little tip.

He's a full-time job.

She's a very valuable member of our family.

Wonderful caregiver.

Will you do me a favor and take Howard out

to the front desk and wait for me there.

You need to get in there.

I wanna say goodbye

before he goes to school.

I'm... Every day.

Okay, buddy. Will you

wait for me out there?

- Okay.

- All right.

- Bye. Nice to meet you.

- Love you.

Isn't he cute?

She's shampooing once a week,

are you kidding me?

Congratulations to Andy Matsin.

Good job.

Also to Mark and his aerodynamics team

for perfecting the exterior

profile of the car

and reducing the drag coefficient

to a very slippery 0.23.

Very good job, Mark.

So I've answered

all the tough questions about the car.

Is it safer? Is it more efficient?

Can it travel further on a single charge

than any other production

electric vehicle out there?

Yes, yes, and yes.

So there's probably one more question

that you all have.

What's the name?

What are we gonna call

this bold new vision?

It's a name that instantly

defines our product.

Ladies and gentlemen...

The Howard.


- Are you kidding'?

- Thank you very much.

- The Howard? Honestly?

- The Howard. Yes.

- That's what we're calling this?

- Yes.

I'm sorry.

I got a real problem with this name, man.

- Oh, God, Nathan.

- Howard? You can't...

You can't call a car Howard.

Come on. Seriously.

I tell you what.

Everybody, let's reconvene in 15.

Nathan and I are gonna

have a quick discussion

about the marketing of this.

Let's move forward.

- Do you like this name?

- It's a great name, man.

Grab that door on your way out. Hey.

All right. Let me just say this, okay.

You brought me into this company

for my marketing expertise, correct?

- Yes.

- Okay.

I hate to toot my own horn,

but you know I was the brains

behind the Edible Arrangements.

1,030% growth in three fiscal quarters.

- I'm aware.

- I'm not making that up.

Call Patrick Lyons, he'll tell you...

Nathan, I'm aware of your success.

It's why we hired you.

Okay. You're making it impossible

for me to market this car. I can't do it.

Nobody's gonna buy a car named Howard.

It's like naming a restaurant Hepatitis.

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Larry David

Lawrence Gene David (born July 2, 1947) is an American comedian, writer, actor, playwright, and television producer. He and Jerry Seinfeld created the television series Seinfeld, of which David was the head writer and executive producer from 1989 to 1997. David has subsequently gained further recognition for the HBO series Curb Your Enthusiasm, which he also created, in which he stars as a semi-fictionalized version of himself.David's work won him a Primetime Emmy Award for Outstanding Comedy Series in 1993. Formerly a stand-up comedian, David went into television comedy, writing and starring in ABC's Fridays, as well as writing briefly for Saturday Night Live. He has won two Primetime Emmy Awards, and was voted by fellow comedians and comedy insiders as the 23rd greatest comedy star ever in a 2004 British poll to select "The Comedian's Comedian". more…

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Submitted on August 05, 2018

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