Christmas With The Kranks Page #2

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Honey, he's like the unelected ward boss

of the street.

So Frohmeyer has a problem

with our skipping Christmas?

Who's he gonna call?

The Three Wise Men? Santa Claus?

Don't underestimate him, honey.

Vic Frohmeyer lives and breathes

for this neighborhood.

-You should've just bought the tree.

-No.

-You didn't have to put it up.

-No.

-You could've left it in the backyard.

-Quiet.

Why are you whispering? This is our house.

I'm whispering for the same reason

you're hiding behind that curtain.

Hey, Walt.

Luther Krank just stiffed the Scouts

on a Christmas tree.

Can you believe that, Mr. Frohmeyer?

Do not put it up there.

I want them on the back of the house.

Move it to the right. The other right.

-Becker's at it again.

-Evening, Vic.

Everybody's going to really miss Blair

this year.

The whole block's talking about it.

How is she doing?

She's doing just fine. Thanks for asking.

How's your family?

In great spirits.

We're putting up decorations tonight.

Wind it tight, Spike!

-Hi, Dad!

-Looks good, Mama!

It's the greatest time of year,

don't you think?

I couldn't be happier.

It's not gonna be the same

without Blair here.

Of course not.

Honey, are you okay?

-Come here. Honey!

-Give me a hand.

There are certain things around here

that I'm gonna miss at Christmas.

So you're...

really skipping out?

You got it.

Somehow, it just doesn't seem right.

That's really not up to you to decide, is it?

But I got to tell you,

the neighbors are pretty upset.

Really?

Christmas has always been a neighborhood

thing around here. You know that.

Everybody decorates.

Everybody bakes cookies, and swaps gifts.

I guess we do it for the kids.

If you're trying to make me feel guilty,

get off of it.

And you know what else?

I'd appreciate it if you...

and everyone else around here

would just respect my wishes.

Whatever you say, Luther.

Weather should be clear tomorrow.

Perfect time to put up Frosty.

Frosty?

Tell you what, truth is, if I'm gone, I'm....

Vic?

Frosty is a Christmas tradition.

Frosty is a Christmas decoration.

I will not be told by Vic Frohmeyer that

I have to decorate my house for Christmas.

Why won't you put up Frosty?

It's the principle thing. Do you understand?

We can forget about Christmas

if we damn well choose.

And nobody,

not even Vic Frohmeyer, can stop us.

I will not be forced into doing this.

Have a good day.

Hi, Nora.

-Morning, Bev. Hi, Walt.

-Hey, Nora!

It was an accident.

Walt, why don't you put

that cat of yours on a leash?

Only dogs wear leashes, old man.

Think you can run away from Christmas?

-I'm trying to.

-Guess it's a good way to save money.

-It's not about the money.

-Yeah, sure.

Muffles, be polite.

Will you two ever be friends?

You know, I'd like to say yes, but....

How you feeling today, Bev?

Have my good days and bad days.

Today's a good day.

I'm glad to hear that.

Come have your breakfast, dear.

I got to get to work.

Still working for the Man, huh?

As a matter of fact, it is a man I work for.

Thought they would've made you partner

by now.

I got to get to work.

Have a good one, old man.

One snowball with a little yellow spot on it.

Just skim the top of that little head of his.

Just like that.

"Old man."

Bah, humbug.

Good morning, Mr. Scrooge.

-Morning, Dox. Do I have any messages?

-Wal-Mart called.

Said I had to buy my own cheap perfume

since Santa Claus isn't coming this year.

Funny.

Nora Krank!

We're here for Frosty!

-Hello.

-Luther.

-Hey, babe.

-They're here.

Who?

Vic Frohmeyer, Wes Trogdon, Ned Becker,

and a gang of their kids.

We're here for Frosty!

-They want Frosty.

-They can't have him.

Nora!

Please give us Frosty.

Honey, where is Frosty?

-He's down behind the furnace. Why?

-They won't go away.

Don't give them Frosty.

You and Luther do not have to do anything!

Just leave Frosty on the front porch.

We'll put him up for you.

-They said they'll put him up for us.

-Absolutely not.

-Please, Luther.

-No!

We'll come back later.

And Frosty better be here.

They're gonna come back!

Listen to you.

You're panicking on the phone

in a locked house...

because the neighbors

are going door to door...

to set up a ridiculous

Sure, easy for you to say.

Miles away in the safety of your office.

Yeah, well--

I am the one trapped here.

I am the one dealing with this!

All right, I agree. So maybe it's time

that you left the neighborhood.

Sure, honey.

How do you think I'm gonna do that?

The street is blocked

with all of our neighbors.

Walk to the garage, get in the car,

start it, drive to the mall...

I'll meet you at O'Leary's.

Do it now! You can do this! Do it before--

Bit more to the left.

That looks good.

-Hi, Mrs. Krank.

-Nora?

Vic, she's leaving!

What's she doing?

I'm so sorry.

Sorry!

Nora, stop the car.

Stop the car. Please, listen.

Don't do anything you'll regret.

Now, please, indulge me for a second.

Stop the car. Listen to me. Give us Frosty.

Stop the car.

We just want Frosty.

Talk to me. Please. Indulge me for a second.

It's us women who handle Christmas,

not men.

I am the one taking the brunt

for your harebrained scheme.

I am the one on the frontlines.

-I have a surprise for you.

-What?

Shut your eyes.

All right, open them.

-Honey, is this some kind of joke?

-No, I got one, too. What do you think?

A woman's bathing suit?

Probably belongs with that.

Nope, got my own.

Look at that. Little cliff-diver thing.

Honey, there is no way

we are wearing these on this cruise.

These aren't for the cruise.

You know what's odd?

Is when an Irish pub serves fish tacos.

I don't get that.

I got a little heartburn. I don't think I'm

gonna do that again. Here it is, right here.

Come on.

Follow me, and don't mention her eyes.

Hello, Mr. Krank.

-Hi, Daisy. This is my wife, Nora.

-Hello.

I really don't want to do this.

No, come on. I got a great deal.

$60, 12 visits.

Why would we get a tan before the cruise?

I thought the whole point was to get a tan

during the cruise.

Look at our skin.

We kind of look like uncooked chicken.

You look like a corpse.

And you could use a little help yourself.

Thank you.

Dear God, this should be outlawed.

Okay, calm down.

Excuse me.

Excuse me. Hello!

I need a BAND-AID.

Nora Krank?

Father Zabriskie. Hello.

What are you doing here?

It's a mall. I'm Christmas shopping.

Of course you are.

Are you okay?

Yes. Sort of.

You're bleeding.

Yes, it's just a scratch.

Could I get another towel, please?

I'm looking for a BAND-AID.

Jeez, lady, make up your mind.

Nora, I hear it from a good source

that you and Luther...

have decided not to observe Christmas

this year.

Yeah, sort of.

Father Zabriskie, Luther and I are fine.

Everything is fine,

and everything is completely normal.

Attendant said you were bleeding.

Are you all right?

-Luther.

-Hey, there.

Father Zabriskie.

Hey.

We've made the front page.

-Check it out.

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