Celeste & Jesse Forever

1

Oh, sh*t, it's work.

Wait, turn it down. Turn it down.

Hello?

Shh. Jesse.

What?

I have to give a sound bite for

the L.A. Times, so no noise for a minute.

I might actually gel a call too,

so if it's noisy, I'll be on a call.

Okay. Ready? Ahem.

All right. This year, all trends

will head toward simplicity and comfort.

Things like Roku, Vudu,

cookbooks and casual wear

will see a spike in the market.

Can I have a drag?

Yeah.

That's perfect. Thanks.

What'd you do'?

Seriously, can you not sit still

for like two minutes?

We talked about this.

No more smoking.

Hey, Disney Hall.

Yeah. I'm not doing it.

Not doing what?

I am not doing that.

- It's just a building.

- It's not trending. Ow!

Ow! Wanna go titty for titty? My arms

are longer. My b*obs are smaller.

Focus on driving.

I am focused on dri-- Ow!

Great.

Jess, that place is amazing.

I'm on a really important call.

- on, okay.

- Uh-huh. Yeah.

I don't know what to say.

Thank you for calling.

Is that about the job?

Awesome. Thank you so much, man.

Thank you, yeah. Talk soon.

Okay, bye.

Was that about the magazine job?

No. But, Celeste,

a swell came in last night.

Northwest.

Apparently, it is overhead

and it is glassy.

What the f*** are you talking about?

Malibu.

The waves are crushing right now.

Are you talking about surfing?

Yeah. Why are you not more excited?

I'm so psyched.

I just thought that was about that job.

The illustration job.

Right. They haven't called me back.

I'm not dying to work there.

Doesn't seem

like you're dying to work at all.

I'm putting together a show.

You know it takes time.

I know.

Okay. Can I drop you off at home now?

I just missed a wave.

At some point, I feel--

Missed another.

All right.

Two more just went by.

Okay.

I could be on those.

Take me home.

Be back by 6 so you can shower'?

Why shower?

Beth and Tucker, dinner.

Right. Yep.

Have fun shredding your glassy peel.

Oh, so wrong.

Love you.

Love you.

Thank you.

Did you guys end up

seeing that band last week?

Oh, yeah. F*** Your Mom?

They were for reals, dude.

Yeah.

Get them as your wedding band.

They're loud but probably pretty cheap.

Or the band that opened,

Please Us, Christ. They were good.

They shredded.

It's done. I told you.

We got the greatest swing band.

Sugarfoot and the Swingin' Scrod.

We actually didn't.

We talked about this.

Swing is so late '90s.

We're not gonna do that.

We're not doing it. We're not...

I'm gonna eat your face, I love you so much.

We'll talk about it later.

And so now we turn to the menu.

Yes, I think the best

idea is to get enchiladas and tacos,

and then we split the two, ja?

This is a clinical choice,

but I must object to your strategy

for I wish to enjoy the tacos alone.

No, but that is not fair.

As long as I can have some bites, ja?

But we know about your bites, don't we?

No.

You take one and then you take many.

Ja, this is true.

Ja, you do.

This is true.

We can't do this anymore.

on, God. on.

Honey, weddings are so stressful,

but I promise you, we know.

- You guys will be fine.

- Just fine.

Yeah. Oh, yeah, we are fine.

No, we're good.

What the f*** are you two doing?

What do you mean?

Yeah.

What do I mean?

You two are not together.

It's not normal, okay?

You guys have been separated

for six months.

You're getting divorced, all right?

And you spend every day together

hanging out as if, like, it's no big deal.

Guess what. It's f***ing weird.

I don't think this is--

Tell them what you think.

Let's not play charades. It's weird.

There's no charades being played here.

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