Catch That Kid

- Oh, no.

- Hi, Mom.

- Hello, Madeline. What are you doing?

Uh, homework.

Over spring break?

You're not climbing,

are you?

- 'Cause you know I don't want you to be climbing.

- No, Mom.

I'm not climbing.

Mrs. Phillips,

they've been waiting for you.

I'm sorry.

Just one second.

Sweetie, I'm gonna be late,

so I'm gonna need you to...

Pick up Max from day care.

Surprise.

Yeah. It's not gonna be

forever, sweetheart.

It's just until I finish

this project.

- All right. I'll be right down.

- Down?

Over.

You know what I mean.

Okay. I'll see you a little later.

I love you.

Good afternoon, Mrs. Phillips.

Nice of you tojoin us.

Are you aware that your security company's

deadline for getting my bank online...

was 23 hours ago?

Uh, Mr. Brisbane...

I did inform you that,

due to the age of the building...

The primary shareholders will be here

for the opening of the bank...

next Friday night.

As I have said, the system will not have been

tested, and I cannot, in good conscience...

That party will take place, Mrs. Phillips,

with or without your consent.

This is one of the most

complex installs...

Hartmann, don't tell me

how to run my bank. All right?

You work for me. Remember?

Now, when I turn around...

both of you will be gone.

And the race is underway.!

Lap masters, secure the roadway.

Number 16...

Number 11, Bad Chad, is into the pits...

as we go into

turn number one.

Hey, retard,

I'm losing the race...

'cause you don't know

what you're doing!

I can't believe Mom made me

hire you as my lead mechanic.

- Damn.!

- Done!

You'd better pray this works.

Number 11, Bad Chad,

is finally out of the pits.

Come on, man.

Come on. Come on.

Chris the Clutch pulling

tight, giving Bad Chad reason to worry.

Looks like that front end may have gone out.!

Number 11, Bad Chad,

is out of the race.

Good job, dorkus!

Dumb, stupid...

Gus!

He's got his own problems.

His crews are out there cleaning up.

We got ourselves a yellow flag.

There she is.

My leading lady, my star.

Sound, speed and...

action!

Maddy!

Maddy.!

Whoa!

Hey! Fart knocker!

I'm gonna kill you!

Stop it!

Cut it out!

Cut it out! Aah!

Not so tight!

Let go!

- Hi.

- Oh, come on!

- Why don't you pick on someone your own size?

- Ah, climber girl.

Go contaminate someone else.

Oh, look.!

Here come Captain Cool.!

Loser number three.

Look, I'm having a barbecue at my house,

if you guys wanna come over.

- Definitely.

- Definitely.

Hey, I don't know

if you heard...

but Bad Chad picked up a shift

at your mama's bank.

I'll be working with Lieutenant Ferrell

in security.

One step closer

to being a cop.

Don't worry. Ferrell won't let Bad Chad

carry a weapon. He's an intern!

Trainee, butt munch!

Sorry. He's training to be a butt munch.

Doing a good job, too!

- I'm gonna brain you.! Get over here.!

- I'm gonna tell Mom.!

You are so dead.!

- When I catch you, I'm gonna give you a purple nurple...

- So immature!

Isn't he?

Okay, folks,

race number three will start in five minutes.

So let's get ready to...

step on the gas

and let's kick some... butt!

It's race time!

"Butt"?

"Butt" what?

- Hi, Dad.

- Hey, kiddo. What's up?

Mom needs me to pick up Max

from day care again.

It won't be forever, sweetie.

All right,

now you sound like Mom.

That's so terrible?

You okay?

Is this a new style

that the kids are sporting?

- Dad, don't freak out.

- When do I ever freak out, Madeline?

- It's just that there are

a thousand other sports...

That don't involve falling

a hundred feet to your death.

Dad, you said standing on top of

Mount Everest was the best day of your life.

No, I said it was

one of the best days of my life.

Look.

See, I even wore

the hat you gave me.

I just don't understand what the problem is

with me trying to be like you.

Do we have to discuss this every day?

Just till I turn 18.

Okay, race fans,

here we are.

The last race of the day!

Drivers,

get in position.

- Hey, Mr. P, can I ask you

a very serious question?

Only if you want

a very serious answer.

Do ladies like guys who build stuff

with their hands?

Or do they go for the nerds who

play computer games and stuff?

Yo, what he means is...

do women prefer

a low-I.Q.? Ber-male...

who only knows stuff

about spark plugs...

or do they prefer

a true artist...

who has both sensitivity

and a brain?

That's a very difficult

question, boys...

but I'm afraid

I'm not the one to ask.

- Hey, Madeline Rose...

- No, no, no, no, no!

Dad, don't call me that.

What are you doing?

- Nothing.

- Nothing. Nothing.

- Ow, ow, ow! Ow!

Aah! Aah!

Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow!

It's an old

climber's trick.

Dude, you're gonna have a scar.

Why do you get all the cool stuff?

It's true. Women love scars.

This drives Maddy's mom crazy. Check it out.

- Whoa!

- That's gross!

- You can touch it if you want.

- Is that from when you fell?

Yep. Hundred-foot free-fall.

Okay, okay. Okay.

Stop touching.

Bad touch. Okay.

Hey, stranger.

Not you too.

- Now, this... is a nutritious dinner.

- Please.

Don't give me

a hard time.

We just miss you.

Especially Maddy.

And I don't wanna have to set my alarm

for the middle of the night...

just so I can have

a date with my wife.

- Would you like to go dancing?

- I have to go back to work. I can't... I really...

- You have to do this first, okay?

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