Carrie Pilby Page #3

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to English 303,

the Modernists.

I'm Professor Harrison,

and you are a bunch of kids

who think you already

know everything

but haven't even

got a clue

about what life

is really like

beyond the ivy walls.

It's banal,

nauseating carousel

of responsibility

and disappointments,

one after another.

But, my sweater

is soft and the rain

streaking down

the window is kinda lovely,

so I guess I won't

off myself just yet.

( students chuckling )

The Modernists,

especially Joyce and Wolff

were very big

on stream of consciousness

techniques

in their novels,

and you just got

your first lesson in it.

Would anyone

like to give it a try?

Say whatever

pops into your mind.

"Franny and Zooey,"

how about you?

Oh, I wouldn't know

what to say.

It's not difficult.

You just start

with your name,

where you're from,

kinda go from there.

My name's Carrie Pilby,

I-- well I was born in London

but I moved to New York

when I was 12

just after my mom died.

I guess I shouldn't

have said that,

'cause now everyone's

feeling weird

about the girl

whose mom died.

Like I'm Antigone

or Harry Potter,

or Bambi or something.

But I'm not a Greek tragedy

or a wizard.

( chuckling continues )

And if I was a character

in a movie,

I'd like to be

Katherine Hepburn,

preferably in a movie

where she gives

Spencer Tracy

a run for his money.

But I can tell

I'm boring you now.

And this is hard,

harder than skipping

fourth and eighth grade.

But not as hard

as skipping second grade,

because going

from pencil to pen

- was pretty abrupt.

- ( girl chuckles )

Professor Harrison:

Excellent.

If you want to use

pencil in my class,

you're more

than welcome.

Now, anyone else

wanna give it a shot?

Man:

Carrie? Carrie?

I really believe

that if you do the things

on this list,

you're going to feel

a lot better about life.

I bet I won't.

So, prove it.

Prove to me

that I don't know how

to do my job.

- You're a very odd man.

- Thank you.

That's the nicest compliment

I've had all day.

Hi.

Davy, I would like

a goldfish, please.

We're having

a two-for-one special.

I just want one.

But the other one

is free.

They're social creatures.

You heard me say

I want a fish, right?

Not a chimpanzee.

Fish swim in schools.

They like company.

Fish swim in schools

because, evolutionarily,

it gives them

a better chance of surviving.

My fish is going

to be living

in a one bedroom

apartment,

not the Great Barrier Reef.

Fine, just

give me two fish.

Great!

Woman:

Taxi!

( shutter clicks )

( camera whirs )

Carrie:

Katherine...

your job

is to prove Petrov wrong.

Spencer, your job is to keep

Katherine happy.

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