Bringing Down the House

Synopsis: Peter Sanderson is a divorced, straight-laced, uptight attorney who still loves his ex-wife and can't figure out what he did wrong to make her leave him. However, Peter's trying to move on, and he's smitten with a brainy, bombshell barrister he's been chatting with online. However, when she comes to his house for their first face-to-face, she isn't refined, isn't Ivy League, and isn't even a lawyer. Instead, it's Charlene, a prison escapee who's proclaiming her innocence and wants Peter to help her clear her name. But Peter wants nothing to do with her, prompting the loud and shocking Charlene to turn Peter's perfectly ordered life upside down, jeopardizing his effort to get back with his wife and won a billion dollar client.
Genre: Comedy
Director(s): Adam Shankman
Production: Touchstone Pictures
  4 wins & 13 nominations.
 
IMDB:
5.6
Metacritic:
39
Rotten Tomatoes:
34%
PG-13
Year:
2003
105 min
Website
509 Views

Are you there?

I'm here.

Help me.|My client is going to jail.

Oh, no, she's not.

I think I've got it.

Really?

Look up Hasson v. Conrad.

Similar circumstantial|evidence...

case was thrown out.

Legaleagle, thank you.

You are by far|the most brilliant mind

in this chat room.

Thank you, Lawyer-girl.

I realize we have|certain anonymity here,

but do you, by any chance,|have a name?

It's Charlene.

I missed you yesterday.

How was your day?

Uneventful.

I exercised for an hour|in the morning,

poked around in the yard|in the afternoon,

and visited with a girlfriend|down the block in the evening.

Sounds innocent enough.

Don't let my humdrum day|fool you, now.

I also have a very dark side.

Well, I'm 31

with long, flowing locks|and an athletic body.

Peter, what do you look like?

I'm... a little older...|6'2".

My hair is...|it's light.

Uh, it's boyishly light.

And good night to you,|Lawyer-girl.

Gendler.

- Good morning, Mr. Sanderson.|- Hi.

Morning, Peter.

How are you?

Gentlemen.

Oh, good. Peter's here.|We can begin.

Okay.|On to pressing business.

Word has come to us

that coffee heiress|Mrs. Virginia Arness

has dismissed|her current tax lawyers.

Virginia Arness.

74 years old, born and raised|in Athens, Georgia.

At the age of 13,

she was shipped off to|boarding school in England,

where she's been residing|until just recently.

That was only two days ago.

Impressive.

Now, we've all heard

that Mrs. Arness has|a penchant for thriftiness.

And that she brings new meaning|to the term "conservative."

It's not going to be easy.

She's paranoid|and suspicious. Peter...

I'm her guy.

I'm single.|I'll give her nights, weekends.

Aren't you getting married|on Sunday, Todd?

That's flexible.

And, Peter, I wouldn't|want this to interfere

with your family's|Hawaiian vacation.

You go on.

I got it all taken care of.

Mahalo.

Well, that's very admirable|of you, Todd.

I mean, your youth|definitely makes you an ass...

...et to the company,

especially at the annual|softball game.

But to an archconservative,|74-year-old woman?

What will we do is not charge|Mrs. Arness one single red cent

for her estate planning.

Why?

Because we don't care|about that measly fee.

We use it as a loss leader|to get her corporate business,

the multibillion-dollar|Arness coffee conglomerate.

How may I help you, Howie?

Just thought I'd congratulate|you on turning it around.

Turning what around?

You snaked Gendler.

Please.|Gendler doesn't bother me.

Oh, that's right.|He doesn't bother you.

What the heck was I thinking?

Listen, I thought|maybe after work

you and me go tie one on,

maybe check out|some of the local talent.

Can't. I'm meeting|Mrs. Arness at 6:00.

And by the way,|it's "You and I go tie one on,"

not "You and me go."

Somebody messaging you here.

Who's Lawyer-girl?

Nobody.

Whoa. Did someone make|a blind Internet date?

No. I mean, you know,|well, technically, but no.

I met her|in a legal chat room.

She's, uh, very classy|and smart.

When do you nail her?

I'm courting her tonight|at 7:00.

Oh, jeez. You're courting her.|Sounds like a hot one.

And this is her?

Yeah, she's attractive,|isn't she?

I suppose.|It's not my cup of tea.

What do you...|she is universally cute.

Eh, she's a little too|anemic-Iooking, Petey.

I like my jello to jiggle,|if I'm not being too subtle.

You're not being too subtle.

All right, as long as she spins|your knobs, I'm happy for you.

Have you nailed anyone|since Kate?

Nail... I was|supposed to call her.

Sofia, can you get my wife|on the phone?

- Ex-wife.|- Ex-wife on the phone?

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Jason Filardi

Jason Filardi is an American screenwriter from Mystic, Connecticut. more…

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Submitted on August 05, 2018

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"Bringing Down the House" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2019. Web. 22 Oct. 2019. <https://www.scripts.com/script/bringing_down_the_house_4708>.

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