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Are you there?
Oh, no, she's not.
I think I've got it.
Look up Hasson v. Conrad.
case was thrown out.
Legaleagle, thank you.
You are by far|the most brilliant mind
in this chat room.
Thank you, Lawyer-girl.
but do you, by any chance,|have a name?
I missed you yesterday.
How was your day?
I exercised for an hour|in the morning,
poked around in the yard|in the afternoon,
Sounds innocent enough.
Don't let my humdrum day|fool you, now.
I also have a very dark side.
Well, I'm 31
Peter, what do you look like?
I'm... a little older...|6'2".
My hair is...|it's light.
Uh, it's boyishly light.
And good night to you,|Lawyer-girl.
- Good morning, Mr. Sanderson.|- Hi.
How are you?
Oh, good. Peter's here.|We can begin.
Okay.|On to pressing business.
Word has come to us
has dismissed|her current tax lawyers.
74 years old, born and raised|in Athens, Georgia.
At the age of 13,
where she's been residing|until just recently.
That was only two days ago.
Now, we've all heard
And that she brings new meaning|to the term "conservative."
It's not going to be easy.
She's paranoid|and suspicious. Peter...
I'm her guy.
I'm single.|I'll give her nights, weekends.
Aren't you getting married|on Sunday, Todd?
And, Peter, I wouldn't|want this to interfere
with your family's|Hawaiian vacation.
You go on.
I got it all taken care of.
Well, that's very admirable|of you, Todd.
I mean, your youth|definitely makes you an ass...
...et to the company,
especially at the annual|softball game.
But to an archconservative,|74-year-old woman?
for her estate planning.
Because we don't care|about that measly fee.
We use it as a loss leader|to get her corporate business,
the multibillion-dollar|Arness coffee conglomerate.
How may I help you, Howie?
Turning what around?
You snaked Gendler.
Please.|Gendler doesn't bother me.
Oh, that's right.|He doesn't bother you.
What the heck was I thinking?
Listen, I thought|maybe after work
you and me go tie one on,
Can't. I'm meeting|Mrs. Arness at 6:00.
And by the way,|it's "You and I go tie one on,"
not "You and me go."
Somebody messaging you here.
No. I mean, you know,|well, technically, but no.
I met her|in a legal chat room.
She's, uh, very classy|and smart.
When do you nail her?
I'm courting her tonight|at 7:00.
Oh, jeez. You're courting her.|Sounds like a hot one.
And this is her?
Yeah, she's attractive,|isn't she?
I suppose.|It's not my cup of tea.
What do you...|she is universally cute.
Eh, she's a little too|anemic-Iooking, Petey.
You're not being too subtle.
All right, as long as she spins|your knobs, I'm happy for you.
Have you nailed anyone|since Kate?
Nail... I was|supposed to call her.
Sofia, can you get my wife|on the phone?
- Ex-wife.|- Ex-wife on the phone?
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Use the citation below to add this screenplay to your bibliography:
"Bringing Down the House" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2021. Web. 30 Jul 2021. <https://www.scripts.com/script/bringing_down_the_house_4708>.