Bonnie Scotland Page #4

- What?

- Where'd you get it?

- I traded our overcoats for it.

That's just like you. Thinking

of your stomach before my pride.

How are you going to cook it?

- I never thought of that.

- No, you wouldn't.

Once again, I have to come

to your rescue...

...and be the mother of invention.

What you going to do?

I'm going to cook the fish...

...over the candle.

I've got an idea that's better

than your mother's invention.

- What?

- Hold this and I'll show you.

A grill.

Put the candle under there

and we can cook the fish on top.

Why, that's exactly

what I intended to do.

Now, give me the fish.

You watch the fish

and see that it doesn't burn.

How does it look?

Never looked better in all its life.

Well, bring it over

because I'm as hungry as a hunter.

Where's the rest of it?

It "shrizzled."

Well, I'm glad you didn't bring

a sardine.

What's going on here?

- Mr. Hardy just had a relapse.

- A relapse?

He's awful sick.

What are you doing?!

Put it out! Put it out! Put it out!

Do something!

Well, do something!

This has gone far enough!

Rent or no rent, get out of my house!

You... You foreigners!

- He can't go out. He hasn't got pants.

- Come on!

Pack up your things and get out!

Get out of my house! Oh, no, you don't!

I'll hold these till you settle up.

- What are you laughing at?

- Why shouldn't I laugh?

Here am I, Oliver Norvell Hardy...

...a man without a home.

A man without a country.

A man without any pants!

- Well, I don't see anything to laugh at.

- Neither do I!

- Isn't that swell?

- Why, that's wonderful.

- What does it say?

- Says we can get a new suit of clothes...

...for nothing. Come on.

- Didn't you hear me say to come on?

- Yeah, but you didn't say which way.

I thought you...

- How do you do, sir?

- How do you do, gentlemen?

What can I do for you?

Why, we read your advertisement

and we've come to accept your offer.

Yeah, we'd like to get measured

right away.

Aye. Well, if you'll just sign your name

to the bottom of that.

Yes, sir.

Now, if you'll follow me, please.

Major, here's a couple

of new customers. Fix them up.

Thank you very much

for your courtesy, sir.

Come here.

Here's the king's shilling.

What's this for?

That's to bind the bargain.

You're now in His Majesty's service.

- What do you mean?

- You're in the army.

What's that got to do with this?

Oh, that's the tailor shop upstairs.

I'm afraid there's been a slight mistake.

We came here to be measured

for a suit of clothes.

Well, don't worry. We'll give you

a suit of clothes you'll be proud of.

- Sergeant.

- Yes, sir?

Have the medical officer thump them

over and take them to the barracks.

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