Blockers Page #5

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(gasps) Oh, my God. We have

to talk about it tomorrow.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Yeah, every detail.

- There's gonna be so much to talk about.

- Guys?

- Hey, guys.

- (laughing)

I want in on this sex pact.

Are you sure? You don't have

to do this just because we are.

No, that's not why.

I want to have sex. Yeah.

That's something

all three of us have in common.

- Mm-hmm.

- Chad is gonna

tap that ass with his penis.

And I doubt we'll have anal

the first time, but...

- All right.

- This is gonna make tonight

- even more perfect.

- Yeah.

- It's gonna be the three of us!

- Yes!

(all laughing)

HUNTER:

Prom night, motherfuckers!

- (whooping)

- I came to dance, dance, dance, dance...

Yeah! Rudy, it's coming up.

Bear left, bro.

Yeah! Jesus, Rudy.

What the f***? Yeah!

Oh, my God,

it's my f***ing dad.

Hands, hands, hands, hands

You, you...

("Dynamite" by Taio Cruz

playing)

HUNTER:

Yeah! Prom night, b*tches!

(Hunter whooping)

- Yeah!

- Oh, God, it's him.

Oh, what's up? Yo!

(singing along to stereo):

We gonna light it up

Like it's prom night

Taio Cruz.

Like it's prom night.

- You got this, girl.

- Don't mess this up,

because that limo

is totally awesome.

Sam. Sam.

Taio Cruz.

Whew!

(music stops)

Sorry.

- Sorry. Ho!

- (sighs)

Whew! (grunts)

You're so grown up. (chuckles)

Dad, what are you doing here?

You think I'm gonna miss

the most important night

of your young life?

(chuckles)

- That's graduation.

- No.

Graduation's for losers.

Didn't even go

to my graduation.

But prom night...

that's a big one.

Prom was the best night

of my life.

I think about it every day,

and I want you to have

the same experience.

Tonight, you have fun.

You don't worry

about any rules that your mom

or Frank laid down.

No one gives a f***

about Frank.

All I know is this...

you look amazing,

and I would love

to grab a quick pic.

No. Go stand

with the other parents,

and try to be normal.

Sam, I'm not a normal parent.

I'm not gonna...

Just... I don't even f***ing...

- Holy sh*t, you invited Hunter?

- No, of course not.

I haven't talked to him since

he and Brenda got divorced.

- You know he calls me all the time?

- What?

He wants to play darts.

I don't play darts.

- Darts?

- You kidding me?

- Anyway, I can't hang out with him.

- HUNTER:
Oh!

- I'll be guilty by association.

- No, no.

- (grunts, whoops)

- I will never forgive that babysitter f***er.

- Hey, Hunter.

- Hey, man. Good to see you.

- What up?

- Hey, all right?

Mwah!

- Ah.

- (Hunter laughing)

Did you have another daughter?

I did. I did. Thank you.

- It's... it's been wonderful.

- Yeah.

I'm thinking about

doing that again.

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