Blazing Saddles

Come on, boys!

The way you're lollygagging around here

with them picks and them shovels...

...you'd think it was 120...

It cant' be more than 114.

Dock that Chink a day's pay

for napping on the job.

Now, come on, boys, where's your

spirit? I don't hear no singing.

When you were slaves,

you sang like birds.

Go on. How about a good

old n*gger work song?

"I get no kick from champagne.

"Mere alcohol doesn't thrill me at all.

"So tell me why should it be true...

"... that I get a belt out of you?

"Some get a kick from cocaine. "

What the hell is that sh*t?

I meant a song. A real song.

Something like...

"Swing low, sweet chariot... "

Swing low? Sweet chariot?

Don't know that one, huh?

How about "De Camp Town Ladies"?

"De Camp Town Ladies"?

Ah, you know.

"De Camp Town Ladies sing this song,

doo-dah, doo-dah.

"De Camp Town race track five

miles long, all the doo-dah day!

"Gonna run all night,

gonna run all day.

"Bet my money on the bobtailed

nag, somebody bet on the bay!"

What in the wide, wide world

of sports is going on here?

I hired you people to try to get

a little track laid...

...not to jump around like a

bunch of Kansas City faggots!

Sorry, Mr. Taggart. I, I guess

we kind of got caught up.

Dummy, the surveyors say they may

have run into some quicksand up ahead.

Better check it out.

Okay, I'll send down a team of

horses to check out the ground.

Horses! We can't afford to lose

any horses, you dummy!

Send over a couple of n*ggers.

You and you.

Sir, he specifically requested

two n*ggers...

...but to tell a family secret,

my grandmother was Dutch.

Get on that hand car and take it

down to the end of that line!

Just trying to help you out.

I didn't know your grandma was Dutch!

"Oh, de Camp Town Ladies sing

this song, doo-dah, doo-dah.

"Camp Town race track five

miles long, oh, doo-dah day.

"Going to run all night,

going to run all day.

"I waged my money on the bobtail nag,

somebody bet on the bay!"

Am I wrong...

...or is the world rising?

I don't know, but whatever

it is, I hate it.

Let me ask you something.

What is it that's not exactly water,

and it's not exactly earth?

Quicksand!

Oh, sh*t, quicksand!

Goddang, now we are in trouble!

They're in trouble!

Get your rope there.

Get over there quick.

Dang, that was lucky.

Doggone near lost a $400 hand cart.

Yeah, we can take it right off to the,

just a little bit to the left of that hill.

But we're going to die, Bart.

They're going to leave us here to die!

Take it easy, Charlie.

My foot is on the rail.

Then maybe down that canyon.

I think it's pretty level off there.

We can't swing back to the right

'cause of that hill there.

That looks like the way

we'll have to go from here.

Yes, we'll put her right down

through there over that ridge.

Well, boys, the break is over.

Don't just lay there getting a suntan.

Won't do you any good, anyhow!

Take that shovel and put

her to some good use!

What?

Don't do that now!

I have to.

Send a wire to the main office

and tell them I said... OW!

Send wire, main office,

tell them I said, "Ow". Gotcha.

And right here, Mr. Lamarr, is

where we ran into quicksand.

Quicksand. Splendid.

And so the railroad has got

to go through Rock Ridge.

Rock Ridge. Rock Ridge. Splendid.

Yes, sir. Yes, sir.

Rock Ridge. Rock Ridge.

Be still, Taggart. Be still.

My mind is aglow with whirling,

transient nodes of thought...

...careening through a

cosmic vapor of invention.

Ditto!

Ditto? Ditto, you provincial putz!

I'm sorry, sir.

A plan. We need a plan.

What in the hell was that?

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