Bill Hicks: Revelations Page #3

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And you can actually go to the sixth floor of

the Schoolbook Depository. It's a museum called...

..."The Assassination Museum".

I think they named that

after the assassination.

I can't be too sure of

the chronology here but...

Anyway, they have the window set up

to look exactly like it did on that day.

And it's really accurate, you know,

'cause Oswald's not in it.

Painstaking accuracy, you know.

It's true, it's called the 'Sniper's Nest'.

It's glassed in, it's got the boxes sitting there.

You can't actually get to the window itself

but the reason they did that, of course,

they didn't want thousands of american

tourists getting there each year going:

"No f***ing way!

I can't even see the road."

"Sh*t, they're lying to us!

F***!"

"Where are they?"

"There's no f***ing way."

Not unless Oswald was hanging by his toes, upside down from the ledge.

Either that, or some pigeons grabbed onto him, flew him over the motorcade...

Surely someone would have seen that.

You know, there were rumours

of anti-Castro pigeons seen drinking in bars...

Someone overhead them saying:

- "coup, coup"

Unbelievable. And you know what's wild?

People's attitudes in the States about it.

Talking about Kennedy, people come up to me:

"Bill, quit talking about Kennedy, man. Let it go."

"It's a long time ago - just forget about it."

I'm like, alright,

then don't bring up Jesus to me.

As long as we're talking shelf life here.

"Bill, you know Jesus died for you" - Yeah, well it was a long time ago. Forget about it!

How about this? Get Pilate to release the f***ing files.

Quit washing your hands,

Pilate - release the goddam files.

Who else was on that grassy Golgotha that day?

"Bill, it was just, you know...

...taking over of democracy by a totalitarian government, let it go."

That's another good thing

about Bush being gone, man,

'cause for the last 12 years with Reagan and Bush,

we have had fundamentalist Christians

in the White House.

Fundamentalist Christians who believe

the Bible is the exact word of God,

including that wacky fire

and brimstone 'Revelations' ending,

have had their finger on the

f***ing button for 12 years.

"Tell me when Lord, tell me when.

Let me be your servant Lord."

Fundamentalist Christianity - fascinating!

These people actually believe that the bi.., uh,

the world is 12 thousand years old.

Swear to God!

Based on what? I asked them.

"Well we looked at all the people in the Bible

and we added 'em up all the way back to Adam and Eve,

their ages - 12 thousand years."

Well how f***ing scientific, okay. I didn't know

that you'd gone to so much trouble. That's good.

- You believe the world's 12 thousand years old?

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